Ha! Ha! Ha! I said it last week, and I’ll say it again. I’m glad Nick Aldis was wiser than the wise man when he gave me what I wanted, a Fatal 4-Way match for the Undisputed Universal Heavyweight Championship at the Royal Rumble between Orton, Styles, LA Knight and Reigns.

Thank you, Aldis. You did good. Roman’s pissed mug was priceless when he was told about the incoming threat. Ha! Love it.

However, Roman told Heyman to fix it. So, naturally The Bloodline’s Solo Sikoa and Jimmy Uso went and attacked Cameron Grimes as he was making his entrance. Grimes had a schedule match against Grayson Waller, but I don’t think that’s going to happen.

Heyman called Aldis a “villainous James Bond wannabe,” Ha! The Bloodline are here under Reigns’ orders to make Nick’s life even more of a complete hell. Quite frankly, I say it’s the opposite.

Side note: Has everyone seen Jimmy’s “No Yeet” shirts? Ha! I couldn’t stop laughing because why??

Aldis takes the microphone from Heyman’s hands and says that the Fatal 4-Way match is inevitable. So, he decides that The Bloodline will be in the main event in a 6-Man Tag Team match against LA Knight, AJ Styles and Randy Orton. Yay!!!

Alas, Reigns isn’t here as always. Aldis gives Jimmy and Sikoa till the end of the night to find a third participant, if they can. Ha! It would surprising if they do. But if not, the fight will be a Handicap match.

Humberto & Angel vs. Joaquin Wilde & Cruz Del Toro –  Tag Team match

As soon as Del Toro and Wilde enter the ring, fists were already flying around like mad. Wilde delivers a clothesline to Humberto, sending both of them onto the main floor, leaving Cruz to deal with Angel.

Del Toro has fire under his butt as he sends Angel backwards with a missile drop kick from the coast of the ring. The LWO later take flight and flatten their opponents.

Oof, that crash. Angel deliberately enlarged the gap between the ropes, so Cruz could slip through it and land harshly on the floor. Whiplash as Santos Escobar is seen snickering in the corner.

Angel knocks Cruz with a brutal running knee to the jaw. Del Toro is now on the receiving end of some fantastic teamwork from his adversaries.

Joaquin Wilde is finally tagged in as he takes down Angel with a couple of clotheslines, a drop kick and a sudden DDT.

Everything was moving in Wilde’s favor until Del Toro was sent on the outside, then Joaquin had to throw Humberto out as well. He climbed to the top only for Angel to disbalance him, and with the help of Humberto, they delivered an impressive back drop to Joaquin from the second rope. Lifting him in the air. Wow.

Wilde wasn’t done for as he reverses an incoming attack with one of his own, a Poisonrana to Humberto. Del Toro also looks to fly again as he crashes into Humberto outside the ring.

While this match is still ongoing, Carlito is back for revenge as he leaps from the audience section and attacks Santos from behind. Of course, he hasn’t forgotten that bruised arm caused by Escobar prior to War Games.

Anyway, back in the ring. Angel manages to pin Joaquin with a cheating move of holding onto the bottom rope to apply pressure. Zelina Vega was both shocked and appalled as am I.

Winners: Angel & Humberto

Backstage in Aldis’ office, Carmelo Hayes is looking to shoot his shot. He was going to suggest entering the Royal Rumble, I heard him, but Waller and Theory just had to interrupt with their screeching voices.

Since Grayson fancies himself above Melo, even though we all know he isn’t, Hayes sanctions a match versus the Aussie icon later night. Given how Waller has just “wrestled”, he wants Theory to step in instead. Ha! Austin was confused though.

Elsewhere, Heyman attempts to convince Carlito to team up with Jimmy and Solo, he fails since Carlito simply wants Santos only. Ha! He takes the apple as a thank you.

Bianca Belair vs. Bayley

I’m not sure what that hell was going on at the beginning of this fight, but Bayley was the one who stopped it from continuing with a massive clothesline to the throat of Bianca. It was momentum, apparently.

Belair takes down Bayley to the mat in a waist lock tightly held by the EST. She puts Bayley through a back drop plus a standing Moonsault as well. The match switches in Bayley’s favor with a running Bulldog.

Belair’s power is amazing to watch as she slams Bayley three times on her back. What was weird, however, is when Bayley was expecting her companions to sucker punch Bianca while she had the official distracted, but…. they didn’t do anything. Hmm.

Luckily, Belair takes the opening to wipeout Bayley with a crossbody onto the main floor. Bayley does turn things around after sending Bianca into the post shoulder first. Then, Bianca reserves into a power slam against Bayley’s spine. Ha!

Although the referee kept telling Bayley to untie Bianca’s braid from the bottom rope, she wouldn’t listen as she rams Belair with a running knee. The EST does use her current dilemma to her advantage as she trips Bayley with her braid resulting in her opponent banging her face against the second turnbuckle.

Since Bayley loves playing with people’s hair, Bianca decides to snap her in half using the post. Later on, Bayley had Bianca when she pulled her into the ring post, but the EST hoists the “role model” on her shoulders and shoves her opponent into the post in return.

Bad landing. Ha!

Bayley is still in this even after receiving so many beatings that I couldn’t help, but laugh through them. She does send Bianca spine first into the turnbuckle.

Another bad landing for Bayley.

Bianca was nearly pinned if it weren’t for the official’s brilliant ring awareness when he noticed that Bayley had her feet on the middle rope to help force Belair down.

Once again, when Bayley pretends she’s badly hurt, she wanted Damage Control to wound Belair, but they didn’t. I’m starting to wonder why not?

Belair picks up the win with a stunning KOD to Bayley as she taunts the rest of Damage Control. Good on you, girl!

Winner: Bianca Belair

Life is so much more blissful when Logan Paul is on mute. Whatever he said earlier in order to rattle KO, I skipped it. All of it. Owens wasn’t so lucky. He heard what the irritant had to say.

How does Kevin have an unfair advantage with an arm cast, when the so-called Maverick is the one with metallic plates in his knuckles?? Regardless of that stupid input, Owens with knock him out senseless.

Owens invites the champ on the KO Show next week, so they could talk about this foolish lawsuit Paul is trying to pull out of his ass for that much deserved punch last Friday.

Next up, we have the Street Profits and Bobby Lashley on stage. All business as they come out in regular clothing, unbuttoned shirts and scowls. They’re not pleased after being attacked by Karrion Kross and AoP last week.

Oh, I just found out what AoP stands for, Authors of Pain. I like the name actually. Very poetic and literal.

Lashley tells them that if they have a problem, they suggest to deal with it face-to-face rather than sulking around in the shadows and jumping them from behind. Instead of showing up, Kross leaves a message.

Karrion’s purpose is to show the world how corrupt they really are by breaking them from the inside. Now, they want to do the same from the outside. We have Akam and Rezar along with their manager Paul Ellering, Karrion and Scarlett forming what they call The Final Testament.

Wow-wee. I’m blown away by how beautiful this sounds to me. They sure know how to create titles.

You know, I thought Pretty Deadly were having a stroke when they called the wise man, “Lord Heyman”. Ha! Ahh! Why?! They idiotically offer themselves as momentary sacrifices until they’re told they’ll be facing Knight, Orton and Styles. Their asses scattered. Ha!

Heyman’s recruitment attempts keep failing when he asks Lashley for help, yet he says that the only time he’ll be in the same ring as The Bloodline is when he’s standing across from Reigns.

For Part Two click on the link below