My, oh, my.

If anything, Roman Reigns is a harpoon rather than a set of wings meant to lift Jey up. He strikes your ass down, and leaves you there to bleed on your own when its convenient to him.

My boys looks liberated and light after finally dropping Roman on his butt like they should have a while ago. Better later than never though.

Because of the breakup we’ve been waiting for happened, the Usos have entered a Bloodline Civil War that will take place at Money in the Bank against Reigns and Sikoa. I got a notification telling me this, but I didn’t fully read it in order to know exactly what they meant. Now I know. Ha!

You have no idea how happy I was when the Usos realized what I’ve known for years now, and that’s that Paul Heyman is the embodiment of three things: a snake, a rat and a weasel. They have yet to use the word “weasel” to describe Heyman, but they got two correctly. That’s perfect!

Heyman has known the twins since they were four-years-old. He said he respected them from day one, but the question still remained as to how can he use their cousin as a tool to drive a wedge between brothers with a loving and respectful foundation? Why?

This sneaky nonsense in the background has emerged into chaos. This won’t be a singles match like Sikoa and Reigns are familiar with. The Usos have surpassed every Tag Team in this company to become the greatest in the game, so how will Reigns and Sikoa work? This is their second time functioning as a double after their first attempt versus KO and Zayn while the twins have been bound to each other since birth.

I won’t bet against the twins. Never. Welcome to the Uso Penitentiary live in a week.

Also, I must be in one the worst, most mind-melting fever dreams to have ever summoned itself. Someone’s deluded brain asked Logan Paul to be part of the men’s Money in the Bank Ladder match next month. I don’t understand why they just let him in. He continues to show up during weekend events, soils the screen then leaves.

I’m not a huge stickler for rules, mind you. I mock them sometimes, but right here, they went too far with my patience. You know who actually deserves that imaginary spot? Bronson Reed. Now I will hardly enjoy the match with him there unless he gets his ass kicked a bit before losing.

If anyone were to ask me if there’s anything about WWE I hate, Logan Paul signing a contract with this industry is number one. It’s like they’re doing this on purpose.


Rey Mysterio vs. LA Knight


LA Knight rams Mysterio against the turnbuckles with his shoulder lodged into his opponent’s abdomen before whipping him into another one.

Rey manages to come back by slinging Knight into a corner then proceeds to hammer away at his head. Mysterio also connects with a 619.

After enduring a painful neck breaker, Rey pulls himself up with a crossbody from the second rope for a near win.

He almost gets Knight with a surprising DDT, but that doesn’t award Mysterio the victory. Rey attempts to connect with another 619, yet Knight intervenes.

Rey escapes from his opponent’s grasp, but suffers a loss due to the BFT awarding Knight the win.

Winner: LA Knight


After Knight’s success, backstage Ridge Holland accidently bumps into an angry Solo. So, Sikoa Samoan Spikes him so hard, you can hear Holland wheezing for air. Heyman was in shocking. Sheamus catches on to this and calls Sikoa out for a match later tonight.


Shayna Baszler & Ronda Rousey (c) vs. Isla Dawn & Alba Fyre (c) – Women’s Tag Team Championship Unification match


This is a fight I’ve been waiting all week to see. I’m SOO excited!

Fyre and Baszler start this off as Alba is the one with the last laugh as she slaps her opponent to create separation and tags Isla in. They play a double team before Dawn enters into a failed cover early on.

Once Ronda comes into the fold, she drags Isla over her shoulders then plummets her body against the mat three times in a row like a dead carcass. Dawn quickly catches Rousey with a boot to her face after the mocking.

Alba tags herself in, yanks Rousey’s ankles from behind the ropes then proceeds to spin her around like Russian Roulette and give her a harsh punch to the face.

For the first time in a while, Rousey and Baszler were being rocked by their challengers. Dawn tags Alba, then rushes to dispose of Shayna before helping Fyre bulldoze Ronda with a running Meteora for a near fall.

Ronda looks to turn things around in her favor by whipping Alba into a corner then attempts to deliver that stepping high knee she does only for Alba to dodge it and kick her in the back of her right leg.

Thanks to Baszler by shoving Isla off the top rope, Ronda was able to deliver a beautifully dangerous DDT to Alba that left her body looking like a boneless creature.

Ronda has Fyre in a predicament with that massive ankle lock. Following some sufficient whining, Alba manages to push Ronda away with a Step-Up Enzugiri. Sadly, while Rousey was able to tag Shayna, Fyre wasn’t close enough to tag Isla as Baszler marches in.

That brutal knee kick Shayna delivers to Alba could have put her away, yet she miraculously stays on.

Dawn comes in exploding, sending a quick cheap shot to Ronda as she continues to take Shayna down with multiple clotheslines then a back German suplex.

Alba notices that Isla is in trouble once Shayna has her in the Kirifuda Clutch, so she delivers a striking Swanton then suicide dives Ronda after she tries to surprise her from behind.

Isla and Alba had this almost won. However, Shayna drags Fyre into the Kirifuda Clutch while Ronda quickly comes back with an arm bar to Dawn. The NXT Women’s Champions were in numerous painful ways until they tapped out awarding Shayna and Ronda the victory of becoming the Unified Women’s Tag Team Champions.

Rodriguez’ sudden appearance during this match was finally answered. She wants a rematch for the titles that they never lost. At first, using the word “we” came as a shock to Baszler, but once Liv Morgan showed up, the entire stadium blew up. Including me.

Winners: Shayna Baszler & Ronda Rousey


Next up we have The Grayson Waller Effect with special guests Pretty Deadly, the No* 1 contenders for the Undisputed Tag Team titles. They said that this show is better than the KO Show….. Uh. That’s all I have to say on the subject.

Moving on. Elton Prince feels like the Undisputed champs haven’t given Pretty Deadly their flowers of respect yet, not putting each other on the same level. What came as a surprise was the crowds’ chanting. They kept telling Prince to shut up. Ha! Ha! Ha!

Pretty Deadly kept boasting about how they beat all five teams last week during the Gauntlet match, which they didn’t, even though, Wade Barrett says that they automatically gain the winning statistics from The Brawling Brutes.


The Street Profits vs. Pretty Deadly – Tag Team match


Montez does a great takedown of Wilson in the center of the ring, placing him in a headlock. Wilson wiggles out of it then meets with a harsh shoulder tackle from Dawkins after being tagged.

Prince comes into the fold as Pretty Deadly play a double team shoulder tackle against Dawkins, rocking him to his spine.

Prince attempts to plough Dawkins from the top ropes, yet he meets with a strong right hand instead. Ha!

Ford drop kicks both members of Pretty Deadly on their asses very quickly. Montez even removes Prince’s bralette and wears it before he and Angelo look to fly. It doesn’t look as fashionable on Montez to be honest. Ha!

Elton runs into a massive clothesline by Dawkins and a Step-Up Enzugiri. A beautiful double team from the Profits on Prince almost grants them the win.

Dawkins shoulder tackles Wilson and isolates him from his teammate. Once Montez was on the top rope looking for a body splash, Wilson comes in and shoves him off allowing Prince to roll Angelo up with the assist of the middle rope and Wilson for a victory.

Winners: Pretty Deadly


Charlotte Flair vs. Lacey Evans


Flair seems to somewhat be making fun of Evans when she literally walked on her back then delivers a couple of chops for good measure.

Lacey is seen as one the most sadistic woman in the locker room as she yanks Flair onto her back after avoiding an incoming attack. She’s looking for a Moonsault, misses, then receives a back breaker plus gets her face shoved into the first turnbuckle.

Charlotte was playing with her food at some point when she started to mock Evans’ “Stand up and salute me,” tagline then follows that up with a German suplex and a winning Figure 4.

She kept that hold even after she won, but Asuka comes out of nowhere and intervenes with a kick to Flair’s face before delivering several blows to her head then escaping.

Winner: Charlotte Flair


Bianca Belair doesn’t approve of how Adam Pearce decided to deal with the situation of banning her at ringside during the Women’s Championship match between Flair and Asuka. She doesn’t trust him, so she’ll handle it.


Sheamus vs. Solo Sikoa


Sheamus begins the match by landing a couple of brilliantly placed punches to Sikoa before squishing him into the corner. Solo manages to fight back.

The Celtic warrior went for the Bro Kick, but Solo is able to duck out of the ring prior to a collision. Sheamus follows him after a few seconds and sends a big clothesline.

Sikoa is brought back inside the ring and slow Sheamus down with multiple shots at his kidney. The Celtic warrior shocks everyone in his retaliation attempt from the top and successfully rains down on Solo.

Barrett finds it funny when Sheamus was only able to get a one count from Solo after that hit given all the physical abuse he endured earlier. Ha! Ha! That’s it?

Even more hilarious was Heyman’s face when Sheamus delivers that brutal clothesline then locks eyes with the warrior sheepishly.

Sikoa continues to work on Sheamus’ back by pushing him against the post then tripping him by yanking his leg, so he could land on the apron followed by a Samoan Drop on the main floor.

Sheamus impressively avoids an incoming attack from Solo with a clothesline to his throat, but that wasn’t enough to put him down after they reached their feet.

Ten Beats of the Bodhran were inflicted upon Sikoa at a slow pace at first given the obvious fatigue and agony in the lower back Sheamus was experiencing.

Solo intercepts a Bro Kick with a Super Kick then receives a harsh knee in the jaw in return. Sheamus’ toughness to deliver a White Noise was commendable, yet insufficient.

Later on, Solo launches himself into Sheamus and the barricade, making an example of him while Heyman looms over. Because of this, the official calls a premature end to this match given Sheamus was knocked out.

It didn’t matter to Sikoa since he’s feeling too betrayed right now to even care, but I think it has something to do with Heyman’s whispering.

What happens next, I didn’t expect. The Usos strut their way towards Solo with grins on their faces. I actually laughed not wanting to, by the way, but they asked for it.

Ha! Ha! Ha! Madness. MADNESS as the Usos Super Kick Sikoa out of existence and then glare at Heyman, who’s squirming near commentary. My boys!!

Winner: No one

 

TOP PHOTO: Morgan & Rodriguez on the left while Baszler & Rousey are on the right. Courtesy of WWE