PHILADELPHIA – Tommy Dreamer called some more of his many friends for a massive show on Saturday night at the National Guard Armory in Philadelphia. The second House of Hardcore show delivered fabulous action, legends, and a nice goodbye.

Here’s what happened:

1) ? and ? and ? vs ? and ? and Danny Doring.
Apparently these are some of Doring’s students. The highlight of this one was a “We the people” chant for one heel that looked like Jack Swagger. Doring hits a legdrop off the top rope to give his team the win.

2) Bill Ortiz vs Mike Mitchell.
Ortiz’ full-body tights made him look like Bam Bam Bigelow, if Bam Bam were a fat Mexican guy. He won after a shoulder press face crusher. After the match, Ortiz attacked Mitchell again. Little Spike Dudley ran to the ring for the save and hit Ortiz with the Acid Drop, earning the first “ECW” chant of the night.

3) Hale Collins vs “Crowbar” Devon Storm.
Physical contest. Hale impressed with a triple rollover suplex. The two seemed to be lacking some chemistry as some moves that should have looked great looked just okay, like a Crowbar hurancarana and a super powerbomb by Collins. Crowbar won by submission when Collins tapped to a Dragon Lock.

4) Vik Dalishus vs Little Guido Maritato.
Now the chanting has begun. “Where’s my pizza? Fat guy ate it.”, “F— him up, Guido.” Good match. Guido hit a Sicilian Slice but couldn’t get the win. He tried for a Killswitch, but Dalishus rolled him up for the upset win. After the match, ? trash talked Guido, and out came the Blue Meanie. He started dancing, and soon everyone in the ring and ringside crew, including Atlas Security, did the Harlem Shake. Then “Enter Sandman” hit and the Sandman entered the ring. He confronted Dalishus’ manager and they started dancing, and were joined by the fans when Fandango’s music played. Sandman ripped the weave off of the manager, and put in on his head. Then, he, Guido and Meanie hit moves on it a la Ric Flair beating up his own jacket, and followed their tribute with a Flair strut.

5) Sami Callihan vs MVP.
This one started off hot with Sami going full speed, including hitting MVP with a suicide dive on the floor. MVP then escaped a running splash on the ringside barrier and the match spilled into the stands. There, Sami brutalized MVP with chairs until MVP was able to escape and head back into the ring. There, Sami still controlled, hitting MVP with a big superplex. MVP avoided a Superfly attempt, and then started throwing punches to take control. They then exchanged moves and the advantage for a while with both met getting several near falls. After a series of thrust kicks to the head, MVP got the surprising win. Stellar match, except for the anti-climactic finish. Was a good final indy appearance for Callihan before reporting for WWE duty, and the crowd acknowledged it with a “Thank you, Sami” chant.

6) “Prodigy” Mike Bennett w/ Maria Kanellis vs Carlito Colon w/ Rosita.
Bennett stalled repeatedly at the beginning, avoiding Carlito to go make out with Maria. Eventually, Carlito was able to get him with a beautiful high dropkick, and a delayed vertical twisting neckbreaker. Not really sure what happened in this match because I was watching Maria. She was chased around the ring by Rosita and they got into a catfight. Then, Carlito spit apple into Maria’s face, and when she was outside, Carlito hit a Backstabber on Bennett. Then Rosita hit him with a moonsault and Carlito pinned him.

7) Alex Reynolds vs Tony Nese vs Petey Williams – Three Way Dance.
The action was too quick to call for this one. Incredible athleticism early on, with Nese impressing with a flurry of acrobatics and aerials. Reynolds slowed things down some and then the three exchanged control as they punished each other. Really good stuff from all three. Reynolds hit Nese with a series of face busters to pin and eliminate him. Shortly thereafter, Petey hit the Canadian Destroyer to get the winning pinfall.

8) Steiner Brothers vs Homicide and Eddie Kingston.
This was billed as a “dream match” but I’m not sure who was dreaming about it. Maybe it was Eddie, who to my knowledge has never worked with the Steiners (I think Homicide may have worked with Scott in TNA, but I’m sure the knowledgeable SLAM! Wrestling readers will correct me). Pretty standard tag match, with Rick taking the punishment for most of it. He finally tagged in Scott, and after a minute they hit the elevated Doomsday Bulldog for the win.

9) John Morrison vs 2 Cold Scorpio.
Nothing much happened for the first five minutes, so they started a dance-off. Scorpio tried a cheap shot during Morrison’s go, but got caught and Morrison threw him out of the ring and did an extended spinaroonie. About this time, I prayed for New Jack to come out of retirement and take out both guys. Finally things picked up, and Morrison hit some kicks to take control. Until things went outside and a big kick sent Morrison over the barricade and literally into the lap of the fat guy beside me and his kid. Around the ring, they exchanged kicks and fought their way back into the ring. Highlights: Morrison missed a Starship Pain but landed on his feet; Scorpio hit a 450 legdrop. Then the crowd went “Raw after Mania” with Fandango singing and “Ole” chants, then “End this s—“, “Don’t come back”, “Ring the bell, Tommy, ring the bell”, “Yes!”, “RVD” and “We want Ziggler” chants, having had enough of this lengthy start-and-stop affair. They took the hint and after a Starship Pain, Morrison got the win. Disappointing for what expectations were for this one.

10) Young Bucks vs Brian Kendrick and Paul London.
Excellent sequence of scientific wrestling to start. Then action picked up with some aerials, with K&L nailing stereo suicide dives. Back in the ring, the Bucks took over, double-teaming effectively to ground both opponents. After an extended beatdown of Kendrick, he finally got the hot tag to London and business picked up. A series of superkicks elicited escalated “Oh!”s from the crowd. So did a Tombstone Piledriver by London on the concrete floor. After hitting a spiked Tombstone and a pair of moonsaults on London, the Bucks won the match of the night. After the match, the Bucks offered a handshake as a show of respect but it was a tease and they left the ring instead.

12) Lance Storm vs Tommy Dreamer w/ Terry Funk.
Though this one began with a show of mutual respect, the ECW rules soon emerged when the two brawled around the ring and Tommy used a sports drink and the ring bell as weapons. Back in the ring, he took advantage of a stunned Storm, but it didn’t last long. Storm hit a delayed suplex and started using the ropes as leverage for a submission, prompting an verbal exchange between him and Funk about sportsmanship. Storm’s aggression continued and he battered Dreamer. Tommy fought back, though, and when he had Storm momentarily dazed, he brought in a chair. An “ECW” chant became an “HoH” chant for the Tree of Woe. But then Dreamer tried for an RVD-esque Frog Splash but Storm moved. Recovered, Storm escalated things by bringing in a chair. He battered Tommy with the chair until Terry Funk stopped him. Then, Funk and Storm fought in the ring. Terry had Storm in his spinning toe hold when X-Pac ran in. He and Storm double-teamed Funk for a while. Dreamer came in, and he and Funk cleaned house. They cleared X-Pac out and then hit a double DDT on Storm, after which Dreamer covered him for the pin.

After the main event, Tommy and Terry mocked X-Pac by doing several DX crotch chops and the DX pose. They, X-Pac and Lance Storm each took the mic afterwards to thank the fans for coming out.