It’s Saturday night and it’s all fight for fighting, especially if you are the Blackpool Combat Club. Tonight on Collision, All Elite Wrestling has hard-hitting action in Penn State country, where Dr. Britt Baker, D.M.D. will pose a challenge to the current AEW TBS Champion, Kris Statlander. Is she ready to undergo an examination from The Doctor?
We’ll find out later in the show but first, let’s discuss yesterday with a…
Rampage Review in Rhyme
*ahem*
The Lucha Bros, plus Matt and Jeff Hardy are now on top,
The Kingdom defeated Christopher Daniels and Matt Sydal to make them stop.
Everyone loves The Acclaimed but Dark Order does not,
And Kris Statlander beat Jade Cargill, who’s apparently done with the All Elite lot.
Maybe she coulda stayed if Rampage had matches that were a better crop.
With that, let us head to…
AEW Collision
We are at the Bryce Jordan Center in State College, PA, the home of the Penn State Nittany Lions. Nigel McGuinness and Kevin Kelly have the call, and Bobby Cruise introduces the First Match of the night between…
Bryan Danielson and Claudio Castagnoli vs. Ricky Starks and Big Bill
Starks and Danielson are in the ring…until he tags in Bill, and his power proves to be a big factor. Tag to Castagnoli, and Bill calls for a Test of Strength. The ROPH World CHampion loses that battle until it goes back to Starks and Danielson and it is an Absolute beating until a slap switches things for the American Dragon. However, the numbers and size game play a factor between Starks and Bill and as they isolate Danielson he is a Dragon in Peril. They hit the ropes and they get a double clothesline and now Danielson has a chance. He crawls over for the hot tag and Castagnoli is a Swiss Cyborg en Fuego. He sends Bill to the corner and gives him eighteen clotheslines and then a European uppercut.
Claudio Castagnoli with a vicious attack!
Watch #AEWCollision LIVE on TNT@starkmanjones | @TheCaZXL | @bryandanielson | @ClaudioCSRO pic.twitter.com/yCYISPbMzs
— All Elite Wrestling (@AEW) September 17, 2023
The best line for McGuinness as the Nittany Lions count along is, “If they can count up to 20, they can graduate from Penn State.” Hah!
However, a choke slam by Bill on Castagnoli gets him a two count, and then Starks comes in but gets swung around by Castagnoli for a count of two. He goes for the sharpshooter until Bill kicks his head in. Then Danielson dives onto Bill and Castagnoli attempts the Ricola Bomb but Starks reverses to a DDT for another two count. Back to the European uppercut to Starks for a near fall and Danielson in to kick away, and goes for a rollup but Danielson transitions to the LeBelle Lock but he manages to wriggle out. Then he lands a spear to Danielson to cover and Castagnoli breaks the count. Danielson goes up the top turnbuckle and Bill trips him. Castagnoli and Bill battle on the outside, while Danielson and Starks jockey for position, and the American Dragon positions for a belly-to-belly superplex but drops his hips and covers for a two count. One low blow later, and Starks delivers the RoShamBo for the win.
Your Winners via Pinfall: Big Bill and Ricky Starks
The Elite cut a promo on The Mogul Embassy, so hit the red button, Brandon.
It's official!#MogulEmbassy will put the #ROH World Six-Man Tag Team Titles on the line against former champs #HangmanAdamPage & @Youngbucks NEXT FRIDAY at #AEWRampage #AEWGrandslam at 10/9c on TNT!
Watch #AEWCollision LIVE on TNT! pic.twitter.com/1FG1JsmDsX
— All Elite Wrestling (@AEW) September 17, 2023
Hobbs with the Book on next chapter on Destruction. No one is safe.
The Next Chapter of THE BOOK OF HOBSS – Destruction!
"It doesn't matter where you are, who you are… you're not safe! Absolutely no one is safe!"
Watch #AEWCollision LIVE on TNT!@TrueWillieHobbs pic.twitter.com/Gj11j2GnmJ
— All Elite Wrestling (@AEW) September 17, 2023
Miro has a rebuttal which involves his Hot and Flexible Wife:
Miro sends an intense message to Powerhouse Hobbs, his Hot and Flexible Wife, and his former God.
Watch #AEWCollision LIVE on TNT!@ToBeMiro | @TheCJPerry | @TrueWillieHobbs pic.twitter.com/tZ46YNXxEN
— All Elite Wrestling (@AEW) September 17, 2023
I think Miro’s priorities are a bit out of whack, but you have fun discussing that with him.
Meantime, let’s go to the…
AEW Tag Team Champion Open Challenge: FTR (Cash Wheeler and Dax Harwood) vs. The Iron Savages (Bronson and Boulder, with Jacked Jameson)
Yeah, you know the drill here. So let’s go to a Haiku in Review™:
*ahem*
No Savage Sauce here
As FTR shows them why
They are Top Guys. Out!
BIG TIME Shatter Machine from FTR!
Watch #AEWCollision LIVE on TNT#AEWWorldTagTeamChampionship@bearbronsonBC | @bear_boulder | @DaxFTR | @CashWheelerFTR pic.twitter.com/JV915QjJDI
— All Elite Wrestling (@AEW) September 17, 2023
Your Winners Via Pinfall: FTR
After the match, The Workhorsemen come out to challenge FTR next week, while Aussie Open looks on from the back.
Lexy Nair is backstage with Keith Lee, and Shane Taylor interrupts as he introduces Lee Moriarty to his STP. He then issues a challenge for a match and the Limitless One accepts.
"Let's begin, shall we?"
Keith Lee just accepted Shane Taylor's challenge for an upcoming match!!! 👀
Watch #AEWCollision LIVE on TNT!@RealKeithLee | @shane216taylor | @theleemoriarty pic.twitter.com/QfePRwFvSi
— All Elite Wrestling (@AEW) September 17, 2023
But until we see that, let’s see the next match between…
Anthony Bowens (with Max Caster and “Daddy Ass” Gunn) vs. John Silver
Apparently, this was supposed to be Evil Uno and Bowens, but the card is subject to change. Speaking of which, Silver said he did some research and learned they are doing scissoring wrong.
(Author’s Note and Warning: I went online and learned that as well. Please don’t look it up!)
John Silver is bringing all the facts before the match in State College, PA!
Watch #AEWCollision LIVE on TNT@Bowens_Official | @SilverNumber1 pic.twitter.com/XU9X51K7bC
— All Elite Wrestling (@AEW) September 17, 2023
Silver also notes in the contract he has tucked in his trunks that Caster and Daddy are not allowed at ringside. As the Penn State crowd rightly calls “B.S.” over this, Bowens takes it to Johnny Hungee but it isn’t long before Silver works him over and during Picture In Picture he is in full control, and then…
Ads (I normally bitch and moan at this point, but can I say I like the new attitude of The Dark Order of late. They have been rudderless since the loss of Brodie Lee, and one has to wonder who would fill those shoes. I have a suggestion later in this recap, but let’s go…)
Back and Bowens is staging a comeback and it’s a dead heat between both men. A clothesline turns him inside out but Silver connects with a corner boot to a brain buster that gets a two count. Silver lines up and punts but misses, and Bowens nails a neckbreaker into a knee strike and then goes out of the ring and lands a discus elbow. All of a sudden, Evil Uno appears from under the ring and throws Bowens to the ring post, and then a running knee gives Silver the three count.
A wild Evil Uno appeared!
Watch #AEWCollision LIVE on TNT@Bowens_Official | @SilverNumber1 pic.twitter.com/061YEobd6U
— All Elite Wrestling (@AEW) September 17, 2023
Your Winner via Pinfall: Jon Silver
We get an Eddie Kingston promo for the ages, so just watch it here:
"All of New York has my back!"#ROH World Champion vs. NJPW Openweight Strong Champion
Title vs. Title#BCC’s @ClaudioCSRO vs. New York’s #EddieKingston
THIS WEDNESDAY at #AEWDynamite #AEWGrandSlam LIVE from NYC at 8/7c on TBS!
Watch #AEWCollision LIVE on TNT! pic.twitter.com/ItgizrzxNQ
— All Elite Wrestling (@AEW) September 17, 2023
Now Renee Paquette is backstage with Hook and Orange Cassidy for a…oh, let’s be generous and call it an interview. They suggest over Doritos they tag team at Grand Slam.
"Wanna tag?"
"Yeah"
"Grand Slam?"
"Yeah"Watch #AEWCollision LIVE on TNT@orangecassidy | @730hook pic.twitter.com/7wNDQttYLy
— All Elite Wrestling (@AEW) September 17, 2023
Cool.
Moving along, Aussie Open comes out and, the former ROH Tag champs have a tag match. before a Haiku or a Squash recipe can be formulated, they beat whoever the jobbers are in one clean swoop. Then Mike Davis and Kyle Fletcher get on the mic and target FTR and compare their accolades, challenging them for the AEW Tag Team titles at WrestleDream.
#AEW WrestleDream!
October 1st | Seattle, WA#AussieOpen vs. #FTR for the #AEW World Tag-Team ChampionshipThe challenge has been issued!
Watch #AEWCollision LIVE on TNT@kylefletcherpro | @DUNKZILLADavis pic.twitter.com/AAhMP12rl2
— All Elite Wrestling (@AEW) September 17, 2023
Uhh…yes, please!
Now for some Noir, we get RJ City and Toni a Storm with an interview on the AEW Women’s title picture with her and Saraya and how things have changed between the outcast members
“I haven’t changed! This business has. I’m still the same lovable, captivating Toni that I’ve always been!”
THIS WEDNESDAY, Toni Storm will challenge #AEW Women’s World Champion @Saraya for the Title at #AEWGrandSlam at 8/7c LIVE on TBS!
Watch #AEWCollision LIVE on TNT! pic.twitter.com/PwJJ20vle4
— All Elite Wrestling (@AEW) September 17, 2023
Essentially, she’s the same Toni Storm. It’s just the squared circle that got smaller,
That leads us to a Scorpio Sky promo…
Former #AEW World Tag Team & TNT Champion Scorpio Sky returns to #AEWCollision tonight and wants to face the best!
He’ll get his chance when he faces Andrade El Idolo!
Watch #AEWCollision LIVE on TNT!#ScorpioSky | @AndradeElIdolo! pic.twitter.com/CN8yNfI4nF
— All Elite Wrestling (@AEW) September 17, 2023
And that means our next match is between…
Andrade El Idolo vs. Scorpio Sky
Idolo offers his hand before the match and Sky shakes the referee’s instead.
Okay, then.
They have a nice back-and-forth match, and Sky shows no signs of ring rust, but El Idolo catches him with a dragon screw leg whip between the ropes and he goes up the top turnbuckle, but Sky pushes off to tumble to the floor. During Picture in Picture Sky is firmly on offense against El Idolo but he continues to tweak his knee with more dragon screw leg whips followed by a flying clothesline, and then he attempts to connect in the corner but Sky stops him. He goes for a couple of roll-ups for a count of two. El Idolo attempts the hammerlock DDT, and Sky gets a rollup for two, and then Idolo transitions from a Figure Four (Woo!)to a Figure Eight and Sky taps out
Your Winner via Submission: Andrade El Idolo
Now they shake hands, but then Jay White appears. He tells Idoloa he needs the Switchblade Spotlight© and challenges him to a match on next week’s Collision.
"Switchblade" @JayWhiteNZ issues a challenge to @AndradeElIdolo.
Watch #AEWCollision LIVE on TNT pic.twitter.com/z2HN5lsuub
— All Elite Wrestling (@AEW) September 17, 2023
We get a recap of the feud with Don Callis and Kenny Omega and how he wants to target Kota Ibushi
The next target for Don Callis and Takeshita is Kenny Omega’s longtime Tag Team partner and close friend, Kota Ibushi.
Are we witnessing the imminent destruction of the #GoldenLovers?
Watch #AEWCollision LIVE on TNT!@KennyOmegamanX | @ibushi_kota | @TheDonCallis | @TakeSoup pic.twitter.com/UJR7gf3a8i
— All Elite Wrestling (@AEW) September 17, 2023
Schiavone with Katsuyori Shibata, and through the power of Google Translate he states he is coming to WrestleDream.
Not only will #ROH Pure Champion Shibata defend the title against @TheNickWayne on @RingOfHonor's #HonorClub THIS THURSDAY, but he just announced that he'll be at #AEWWrestleDream LIVE on PPV on October 1st in Seattle! Watch #AEWCollision LIVE on TNT!@K_Shibata2022 pic.twitter.com/jtzZB7Soxl
— All Elite Wrestling (@AEW) September 17, 2023
And our next match is…
The Hardys (Jeff and Matt Hardy) vs. The Righteous (Vincent and Dutch)
If you are not familiar with The Righteous, imagine what would happen if White Zombie became a tag team faction.
Yeah, you’re welcome.
Basically, The Hardys put up a fight throughout the match, but Dutch stopped Jeff’s Swanton Bomb and assisted Vincent with a spinning cutter to get the pin.
Dutch and Vincent get on the mic and ask the crowd if they now dig what they’re saying after beating The Hardys. But they got their sights set on other things like the current ROH tag team champs, Adam Cole and MJF. It’ll be interesting to see if they can beat Better than you, Bay Bay.
Personally, I think it would be a better use if The Righteous and The Dark Order merged forces.
Just a thought I had. So, booker monkeys…make it happen!
Tony Schiavone is backstage with FTR responding to Aussie Open, and they answer their challenge once they get past The Workhorsemen.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!#AEW World Tag Team Titles are on the line!#FTR (c) vs. The Workhorsemen next week on #AEWCollision!
But FTR had some comments about #AussieOpen.
Watch #AEWCollision LIVE on TNT@DaxFTR | @CashWheelerFTR | @Antnyhenry | @RealJDDrake pic.twitter.com/41jpuTlKux
— All Elite Wrestling (@AEW) September 17, 2023
Next, Schiavone has Starks and Bill, and they want a Texas Death Match. Simply put, Starks wants to put an end to a Danielson before any dream match with Zack Sabre, Jr.
The violence continues to escalate!
NEXT WEEK #AEWCollision
TEXAS DEATHMATCH@starkmanjones vs. @bryandanielsonWatch #AEWCollision LIVE on TNT pic.twitter.com/jALEZnSc7Y
— All Elite Wrestling (@AEW) September 17, 2023
Jim Ross joins at commentary for the Main Event and it is for the..
TBS Championship: Kris Statlander vs. Dr. Britt Baker, D.M.D.
Statlander had defended the TBS less than 24 hours ago against Jade Cargill, so she may be running on fumes. Baker comes decked out in Nittany Lion colors to the delight of the Penn State fans, and I now hate her a little more.
(Author’s Salty Note: It was at the beginning of January 2023 in the Rose Bowl that my alma mater The University of Utah lost to Penn State. I chose to flip off an obnoxious Nitanny fan at the local bar, who decided to jam my middle finger as a result. Therefore, anyone who has an alliance with Penn State has made my enemies list and I hope nothing but the worst for them, collegiately and personally. I am not a crackpot; just very vindictive.)
The bell rings and both women feel each other out even though there is a lot of love in Baker’s favor (BOO!) Stalander attempts a move but lands awkwardly on one of her bad knees. Baker comes back with a neckbreaker but the champ returns with a powerslam for a count of two.
Kris Statlander is quick to counter and follows up with a powerful power slam!
Watch #AEWCollision LIVE on TNT#TBSChampionship@callmekrisstat | @RealBrittBaker pic.twitter.com/tVYMuYPdVp
— All Elite Wrestling (@AEW) September 17, 2023
During Picture in Picture, Statlander has a twenty-second vertical suplex and uses her power to keep Baker down. Baker finally gets the champ up the top turnbuckle but gets sent down and as she goes for a moonsault Statlander ends up belly-flopping dead center of the ring. Baker stun guns her on the top rope and then drags her down and rams her knees into the ring posts.
Britt Baker looks to capitalize on the damaged knees of Statlander!
Watch #AEWCollision LIVE on TNT#TBSChampionship@callmekrisstat | @RealBrittBaker pic.twitter.com/qUJMxNz8Fd
— All Elite Wrestling (@AEW) September 17, 2023
Baker then goes to multiple sling blades but Statlander comes back with a Blue Thunder Bomb for a near fall, and then quickly lands a Michinoku driver for another two count. Baker manages to trip up the champ and goes for a curb stomp for another two count. Then she pulls out the glove and attempts her Lockjaw submission but Statlander rolls through for a close pin attempt. Both women are firing live bombs and Statlander is close to getting some near falls, but Baker pulls out all the stops with a Canadian Destroyer, followed by the Angel Wings and then a curb stomp for a close two. She goes up the top turnbuckle, and Statlander catches her but she transitions to an Octopus stretch into a Lockjaw.
The Lockjaw is applied!
Watch #AEWCollision LIVE on TNT#TBSChampionship@callmekrisstat | @RealBrittBaker pic.twitter.com/ryXcwLw1VP
— All Elite Wrestling (@AEW) September 17, 2023
Statlander goes down and then rolls Baker’s shoulders to the mat for the one, two, and three!
Your Winner, and Still AEW TBS Champion: Kris Statlander.
Both Statlander and Baker shake hands after the match, and even though we briefly see Julia Hart watching on in interest, Statlander stands tall as the show fades to black.
Top Photo: Britt Baker and Kris Statlander go to the limit in the main event for the AEW TBS Title (from left).
AEW Rampage and Collision - 09/15-16/2023
Final Thoughts:
The extra half-star is for Statlander defending her TBS title on both Rampage and Collision in less than a day. If I knew she was gonna do that, I almost woulda covered Rampage more in earnest.
Almost.
Mostly, this was to establish what matches to expect with Grand Slam and WrestleDream, and that’s fine and dandy.
But for now, See ya next Saturday