The last “Thrill”-ing episode of NWA Powerrr on Roku

The last episode of NWA Powerrr on The Roku Channel before they head to The Crockett Cup on COMET!

Tommy "Milagro" Martinez

The last “Thrill”-ing episode of NWA Powerrr on Roku

It’s the last NWA Powerrr on The Roku Channel, and the National Wrestling Alliance will have The Good Brothers ready to tune up before The Crockett Cup, and a one-of-a-kind match in the ongoing feud between Daisy Kill and Eric Smalls. Plus, “Someone will have a chance in the Main Event to face the NWA World Heavyweight champion, “Thrillbilly” Silas Mason, for the Ten Pounds of Gold.

All this before the NWA makes its debut on COMET on a two-night event starting May 1st.

Who will be the lucky number one contender this evening?

We will find out as we come to you from the PowerrrStation in Tampa, FL. Joe Galli, Danny Dealz, and Tim Storm have the call as your First Match of the Night is…

Wrecking Ball Legursky vs. Dr. Viktor (with Ms. Starr

This is to determine the number one contender for the Ten Pounds of Gold, and Dr. Viktor got suckered… err, “convinced” by Ms. Starr that this will win the interest of “La Princesa” Tiffany Nieves.

Not her affections, her “interest.”

This is less a match than an exercise in futility. Also, allow me an…

(Author’s Note: Men, always heed the advice of the great philosopher Meatloaf, who once said, “I would do anything for love, but I won’t do that.” I learned that the hard way, and that’s why we never talk about Provo, UT ever again.

*ahem*

Legursky just beats the good Doctor stupid, and he finally has the common sense to roll out of the ring.

Ms. Starr fires up Viktor, and he gets a spot of hope until the Wrecking Ball slams it out of him. Viktor is outside once again, and Legursky follows for a rushing slam. Viktor rolls out in the nick of time, and Legursky hits the post. He gets back in the ring as the ref makes the count, and that means, as Kyle Davis announces incredulously…

Your Winner via Countout, and The New Number One Contender: Dr. Viktor?!

Nieves comes out…enthralled, I guess. Either way, Dr. Viktor is a sore winner (literally) and will soon experience newfound pains later tonight.

Backstage, Nieves directs the good Doctor on how to cut a promo. Mason steps in and shows him how a promo is done, and he promises to do everything in his power to turn him into a corpse.

Again, Dr. Viktor is questioning what he got himself into, and I can’t blame him.

Now for a tune-up match with…

The Good Brothers (“Machine Gun” Karl Anderson and Doc Gallows) vs.The Rewind Society ( VHS and Samuel C)

Gallows and Samuel start, and he shows the Good Brother his dance moves, followed by clotheslines that do nothing. One shot by Gallows, and Samuel feels his soul escape as he quickly tags in VHS. He, too, dances Gallows and Ansderson have had enough of this Dance Dance Revolution as the Good Brothers are not kind to the member of Rewind Society.

One Magic Killer later, and it is Too Sweet for Doc and Machine Gun.

Your Winners via Pinfall: The Good Brothers

Gallows and Anderson look good as the number two seed heading into The Crockett Cup.

Speaking of other contenders, in the ring with Kyle Davis are The Colóns and Joe Cazana with The Country Gentlemen. He suggests to both men that they have a chance to earn the Cup. Papa Joe respects the father of The Colóns, but suggests they are nothing once they leave their island of “Porco Chino in the South Pacific. Primo corrects him on his geography and lets them know they are winning the Crockett Cup. He also adds that they do not like to beat old people… but they would love to beat down their pops, and the Tampa crowd relishes that thought.

Tiffany Nieves puts Gisele Shaw on notice that when she comes for her NWA Women’s Television title, she will still be on top in the NWA.

Get it. Got it? Bueno.

The Immortals, the current number-one-seeded contenders and NWA World Tag Team champions, are in a video promo about winning the Cup last year and how they stand with past winners, warn everyone in the tournament that they are prey to none, friends to few, and predators to all.

Now for women’s tag action with…

Pretty Empowered (Kenzie and Kylie Paige) vs. “The Supreme” Sirena Veil and “HollyHood” Haley J

Kenzie gambles her NWA World Women’s Title No. 1 Contendership, with the added stipulation that if Veil and Haley J don’t win, neither gets a shot at The Burke for a year.

The Paige sisters start throwing hands and folks…Tennessee women are built differently, if you haven’t guessed. Haley and Veil duck out, and the match has yet to begin. “The Supreme” steps in, and then the match is officially begun with Kylie and Kenzie feeling Pretty Empowered on the upstart. Haley blindsides the former women’s champ, and Kenzie is in Peril against the viciousness of Veil and Haley.

She manages to escape and rolls to her corner for the Hot tag to Kylie, and she is Pretty en Fuego. A Shining Wizard to Veil, and Haley breaks it up, but she gets knocked out by Kenzie. The Paiges attempt a tower cutter, but Haley chop blocks
Kenzie, and then she dives on the outside to the Boughiest Bitch.

As Veil and Kylie battle in the squared circle, she delivers the Bloodbath on the younger Paige and covers. Kenzie tries and is too late to make the save as Veil earns a spot at The Burke.

Your Winner via Pinfall: Sirena Veil and “Hollyhood” Haley J

Natalia Markova cuts a promo after watching Veil win her match and congratulates her. She tells her to get ready at Crockett Cup, as the NWA Women’s World Champion promises to show why she is The Crush.

Now for something REALLY different in major microdoses, it’s an inaugural…

Shanghai Pain Stick Lethal Ladder Match: Daisy Kill vs. Eric Small

Pretty simple: you climb the ladder, grab the kendo stick, and then beat your opponent with it. Also allow me another…

(Author’s Note: Hey, at least it’s not Judy Bagwell on a pole.)

Moving along, Kill chases after him, but trips into the turnbuckle. Smalls attempts with a bronco buster but misses, and he hits him crotch first into the post.

Kill leads the Half Pint Punk around and tosses him into the steel stairs, and then jaw jacks with the Tampa crowd. He turns around, and under the ring is a kendo stick lying on the ground. He grabs it, and Smalls is on the other end and nails him in the…err, little RockStars.

Smalls smacks him around and climbs the ladder to grab the stick. Kill gives him a taste of his own medicine with a perfect shot in the primary target, and rolls up Smalls with his feet on the ropes to get the pin and the win.

Your Winner via Pinfall: Daisy Kill

After the match, Kill blasts the stick on his back until it becomes splinters.

Now, you would think this is the end of that feud, but I can say for certain it’s not.

How do I know? Spoilers.

Sirens Veil is happy she beat the Paiges to win a title shot, and relishes the opportunity for a shot at The Burke against Natalia Markova

Now it’s time for your Main Event, and this is for the…

NWA Heavyweight Championship: “Thrillbilly” Silas Mason(c) vs. Dr. Viktor (with Ms. Starr)

Again, Viktor is rethinking his poor life choices, but tries to channel his Bruce Lee. For his part, Mason acts like it’s the Kumite and chases him off. After a brief jog, Viktor tries to punch him in the breadbasket, but the rock-hard abs of the champ barely get fazed. Big Daddy Thrill proceeds to pull his shirt over his head like it’s the Stanley Cup playoffs and spanks him…literally.

He slams Viktor and covers for one, two…and he picks him up. Mason ain’t done with the good Doctor’s physical therapy session. As he converses with Ms. Starr, standing outside, Viktor uses a belt to choke Mason, but it only enrages the big man. A superkick is blocked, and he takes the Doctor on a ThrillRide to pin him mercifully in one, two, and three.

Your Winner via Pinfall, And Still NWA World Heavyweight Champion: “Thrillbilly” Silas Mason

Mason gets on the mic and addresses Bryan Idol getting another shot at the Ten Pounds of Gold at Crockett Cup. So, let me leave it to Mason to “Thrill ‘Em All” with his words:

“It’s come to my attention that one Brian Idol is going to be getting the next NWA championship shot in Forney, Texas, at the Crockett Cup.

I don’t know what kind of disgusting blackmail he must have on William Patrick Corgan, but how he keeps getting so many [sic] opportunity after opportunity makes me absolutely sick. You know, it’s starting to make sense. Billy Corgan is wasting the best top talent he’s ever had in this company on pieces of trash like that. I guess he’s addicted to pissing away talent, just like he’s addicted to pissing away money. But Billy, I couldn’t give a damn what you or anyone else want.

Brian, look at me, you piece of trash. Look at me. You did this. You made the blood spill from the head of the greatest man this planet has ever produced. That is a sin that will never be forgiven. Brian, in Forney, Texas, you’re going to see the Southern Six raise the Crocket Cup high, and when you step in there with the ThrillBilly, you will die!

Because I am The NWA World Heavyweight Champion, the ThrillBilly himself; Silas Mason.”

And that is where we will end it as this show draws to a close on The Roku Channel, and we’ll see you on their two-night debut on COMET this Friday.

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