Tournaments, Titles, and Thievery take place on this NWA USA

It’s Saturday, and there’s nothing to eliminate here because this is NWA USA. The National Wrestling Alliance is gearing up for a trip to Mexico and the pay-per-view in Chicago with the NWA Women’s Television tournament, and there is title action in the main event with the NWA US Tag champions, the Country Gentlemen.

But we head to the PBS Studios in Tampa, FL., where Joe Galli, Tim Storm, and Velvet Sky have the call.  It’s already getting raucous as the First Match is the…

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NWA World Women’s Television Title Tournament: Jennacide vs.Taya Valkyrie

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Both these women have faced off before, and the intensity is already turned up.  The bell rings and they get a collar and elbow tie-up.  Valkyrie lands the first chop, but Jennacide shakes it off saying she likes it.  It’s hard-hitting action between the Bionic Beast and La Wera Loca, and Jennacide adds a springboard arm drag to Valkyrie.  However, Valkyrie comes back with her signature Pandemonium (snap German suplex while Jennacide is prone on the middle ropes) and covers for a two count.

Jennacide shakes it off and keeps Valkyrie grounded with a surfboard and pushes her between the shoulder blades face down into the mat, and then stomps her.  That only garners her a two count.  She continues her assault with a crossface forearm into a camel clutch and sits down hard, targeting her back.  The Bionic Beast is firmly in the driver’s seat, whips Valkyrie into the corner, and follows with a big boot.  She goes for a tackle and Valkyrie dodges and rolls up Jennacide for a one count.  Valkyrie mounts a comeback with a big clothesline for a two count.  Jenna and Valkyrie make standing switches and La Wera Loca finally gets in position and nails a Northern Lights suplex for another two count.  Jennacide attempts a tombstone piledriver, but Valkyrie reverses and escapes to land a high knee followed by the Road to Valhalla finisher, and that means…

Your Winner via Pinfall, and Advancing in the Women’s Television Tournament:  Taya Valkyrie

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Chris Silvio, Esq., Blake “Bulletproof” Troop, and Jax Dane are joining Kyle Davis at the Podium, but Silvio mentions his services aren’t required. Silvio then lays it down and says Dane and Troop are two of the most dangerous men in professional wrestling today. Dane now has Troop to watch his back and he uses Troop’s catchphrase to point out that the MMA fighter will “drop warheads on people’s foreheads.” Silvio continues to go on and note that his client Dane has won all the major titles in the NWA…except for the US tag titles. Silvio uses this as a warning to The Country Gentlemen as well as to the audience, “We are the outlaws your mama warned you!”  Silvio makes his closing argument that Dane and Troop will take the tag championships.

I mean…it’s no Law and Order, but it was an entertaining promo.

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May Valentine is backstage with Joe Alonzo, and he says every successful person in the NWA has a manager to do the political side of glad-handing. Alonzo then lets us know he now has a business partner; “That Dude” Jamie Stanley. Stanley comes out and says that between Alonzo and “America’s Jawline (patent pending) they will be a Dynamic Duo and promises the fans to expect greatness.

I was wondering what Stanley was going to do after Colby Corino left.  Now I know.

I also know your next match is…

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“Magic” Jake Dumas (with CJ) vs. Mercurio 

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This match was supposed to be on POWERRR this Tuesday, but it got bumped due to Rolando versus Tyrus.

Before the introductions can get through, Dumas is livid and storms to the ring.  Markova joins Mercurio, but the ref forces her to leave ringside since she does not have a manager’s license.  As Mercurio protests, Dumas uncorks on him.  Mercurio clocks him on the jaw, but Dumas comes back with waist lock takedowns.  As he charges into the corner, Mercurio gets a boot up and then a blow to the back to Dumas.  He then focuses on the bad leg of Dumas (who just recently came back from a broken leg), and then a butterfly suplex for two.  Dumas clutches his leg and attempts a comeback with a neckbreaker but Mercurio kicks the bad leg again to drop him like a sack of potatoes.  Mercurio nails with a thrust kick and goes up to the top turnbuckle, but CJ blocks his ascent.  Dumas uses the distraction to plant him with a tombstone for the pin and the win.

Your Winner via Pinfall, and Still Better than Criss Angel:  “Magic” Jake Dumas

Dumas has a playing card, but before he can make a mark to give him the-a ugly face, Mercurio scurries out of the ring to keep his beautiful visage.  

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There is a recap of this past NWA POWERRR with the beatdown by Tyrus to Rolando Freeman, and him seeing BLK Jeez and EC3 at ringside. Read on if you want to see what took place to kick off the new season of the NWA.

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Kylie and Kenzie Paige are backstage with May Valentine.  She asks Kenzie if she is planning on leaving Pretty Empowered as she wanted Ella Envy and Roxy to team up on the rematch with The Renegade Twins. Kenzie says that was a stupid question since she sees herself as the leader of Pretty Empowered, and she doesn’t like the disrespect. She’s going to let them shine on.  As for Kylie, she says it only makes sense to have the two hottest sisters in the NWA and call it home.  Now Kenzie and Kylie go off and are going to talk about boys or boy bands or…something.

I don’t know, I’m not a tween.  I just have an M.B.A. and write for Slam!

(Author’s Shameless Plug:  This is the drinking game for TV TAN PODCAST:  The Only TV Podcast That Matters™.  Listen Harder!)

Now back to your regularly scheduled Main Event, and this is for the…

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NWA United States Tag Team Championship: The Country Gentlemen (“The Legacy” A.J. Cazana and “Thoroughbred” Anthony Andrews)(c) vs. The Spectaculars (Brady Pierce and Rush Freeman, with Rolando Freeman)

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Galli points out that The Country Gentlemen have the old and new US tag titles, and the old titles that The Fixers once wore have since been decommissioned, and they’re just ceremonial. 

Gee, I wonder why he made an effort to point that out.  Foreshadowing much?

Anyways, Cazana and Pierce are in the ring to start and The Legacy slams him with ease.  Now a tag to Freeman and Andrews, and The Thoroughbred is also making short work of The Spectacular.  The Country Gentlemen give double slams to Spectaculars in the ring, but then The Fixers come out at ringside they abscond the old US tag titles.

Now Andrews is isolated on the Spectacular side and is a Thoroughbred in Peril, and Pierce manages a textbook powerslam to cover for two.  Andrews fights out and gets the hot tag to Cazana and he is a Legacy en Fuego.  He tosses Freeman around and charges into the corner.  Freeman evades and Cazana runs into turnbuckle. Freeman nails a belly-to-belly suplex to cover, and Andrews breaks up the count.  Cazana gets isolated again and the Spectaculars shoot him into the ropes for a double backdrop, but The Legacy puts on the brakes and sends Pierce over the top rope.  He tags in his cousin Andrews, and a double-team finisher (Andrews picks up Freeman in a reverse atomic drop set up and Cazana goes up top for a reverse clothesline to the back head) allows Cazana to cover for one, two, and three.

Your Winners, and Still NWA USA Tag Team Champions:  The Country Gentlemen

The Gentle celebrate with their hands raised and one of the US Tag Titles in each hand.  As for the old titles, we’ll have to wait to find out why The Fixers took the old belts as the show goes to the credits.