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Stunts highlight SummerSlam

He got the girl but he didn’t get the belt. Authentic Olympic hero – Kurt Angle – favoured to sneak away with the WWF World Heavyweight Title failed to capture gold at the SummerSlam pay-per-view. He did however win the conciliation prize: Triple H’s “wife”, Stephanie McMahon-Helmsley. Craftily used by WWF bookers as a way to disguise another in a string of dull “been there – done that” matches between The Rock and Triple H, Angle scooped up an “unconscious” Stephanie and whisked her away while Triple lay dazed and The Rock stood triumphant.

In essence, Angle’s participation in what was billed as a Three Way main event was nothing more than a guest appearance leaving The Rock and Triple H to sleepwalk through their standard routine which wore out its welcome a long time ago. With the lame love triangle of Angle, Stephanie and Triple H taking precedence, the bout itself was a mere formality once Angle was injured before the bell even rang. Fed up with Angle’s romantic interest in his “wife”, Triple H didn’t even wait for the bell or The Rock to get things under way. Brawling with Angle at ringside, Triple H set-up Angle for what should’ve been a Pedigree through the Spanish announce team’s table. Just as Triple H was about to lower the boom on Angle the table suddenly gave way and both men crashed to the floor. Triple H checked to make sure Angle was okay then pulled a sledgehammer out from under the ring and stalled until The Rock arrived.

As Angle was being wheeled away on a stretcher, Triple H attacked him some more. The Rock quickly intervened. Taken to the back, Angle wasn’t seen again until the finale of the match. Standing by her man, Stephanie McMahon-Helmsley came to ringside even though Triple H had told her to stay in their locker room. Per Triple H’s instructions, Stephanie retrieved the WWF World Title belt, swung it at The Rock and missed delivering a weak shot to Triple H’s head. Hampered by a sledgehammer blow to the abdomen earlier, The Rock upped his offence.

The Rock and Triple H fought on. Stephanie stopped the EMTs from taking Angle away to the hospital begging him to help her “husband”. “I’ll do it for you, Stephanie,” said a groggy Angle stumbling back towards the ring. Triple H didn’t require his help though. A Pedigree had guaranteed him the victory. Angle halted the count by pulling Triple H out of the ring and slamming him head-first into the ringside steps. Angle and The Rock briefly tussled each getting two counts. A Rock Bottom had Angle beat but Triple H pulled The Rock out of the ring saving Angle’s hide and his own chance at winning the WWF World Heavyweight Title. Stephanie hefted the sledgehammer in the ring. Triple H cocked his fist back to clock Curt Angle. Angle moved and Triple H slugged Stephanie KOing her. Angle picked up the sledgehammer nailing Triple H in the head then swung around to face The Rock. The People’s Champion clotheslined Angle over the top rope, hit the People’s Elbow on an oblivious Triple H to retain the title. While Triple H napped, Angle scooped up Stephanie in his arms carrying her to the back.

Awwww. Isn’t true love wonderful? Retch. Retch.

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