WrestleMania Night Two: The Last Time is Now for John Cena

Tommy "Milagro" Martinez

WrestleMania Night Two: The Last Time is Now for John Cena
John Cena wins his 17th World title on Night Two of WrestleMania 41 at the Allegiant Stadium in Las Vegas, NV, on April 20, 2025. Courtesy of WWE.

Welcome to the Showcase of the Immortals, and on Night Two of WrestleMania, we will see if John Cena makes good on his promise to become the seventeenth time WWE champion. But standing in his way is the American Nightmare, Cody Rhodes, and he will face him in the Main Event. Can Rhodes ensure The Last Time is Now for Cena on his retirement tour?

We’ll see what happens at the Allegiant Stadium in Las Vegas, NV. Michael Cole, Pat McAfee, and Wade Barrett have the call, and if ya missed out on Nick Tylwalk’s epic recap (right use of the word) last night…shame on you and catch up here.

We get Ava Max singing the Star Spangled Banner, allow me the first of many…

(Author’s Rants: Yeah, I don’t know who she is, either. Also, Canada, please don’t boo that hard. Most of America knows what kind of an Orange Reich we are dealing with. Don’t judge too hard…except for that performance.

What, was Jelly Roll off that night?)

Anyway, Stephanie McMahon is out and kicks it off with the following message…

With that, your First Match of the Night is a…

Triple Threat Match for the WWE Women’s World Championship: Iyo Sky (c) vs. Bianca Belair vs. Rhea Ripley

This is the second time the WWE World Championship has been featured at the beginning. Kinda says a lot about the belt’s importance. Otherwise, “Mami” is over in Vegas as Ring Announcer Alicia Taylor with the boxing-style intros.

As Belair and Ripley bicker, Sky reminds them both that she is the champ and it is a fast-paced match. Belair shows off against both women until Sky pulls her off by the braid. All three tumble outside, and Sky hits a moonsault to Belair, but it’s not long before she shows why she is the EST of WWE. She slams Sky on the outside with an assist from Ripley and ties her up until Belair breaks it up. The best part is when all three get up and land a Tower of Doom.

There’s a series of near falls, but the end had Belair use her braid as a whip, and nails the KOD, but Sky launches with a moonsault, and the Genius retains…

Your Winner, and Still WWE Women’s World Champion: Iyo Sky

Not a bad way to get the crowd going in Vegas.

We see at ringside Flavor Flav, Rich the Kid, and Merab Dvalishvili in the crowd, as your next match is a…

Sin City Street Fight: Damian Priest vs. Drew McIntyre

There is a lot of animosity between the Scottish Psychopath and the Priest, stretching back to last WrestleMania, as he beat McIntyre for the WWE World title. Priest comes out to Slayer guitarist Kenny King…

This is just an ugly match, with both men brawling from the ring up the ramp, Outside of McIntyre taking a selfie like he did last year to capture the moment.

What better way to cover this than a Sin City Squared Circle Clerihew™

*Ahem*

McIntyre just hits Priest in a Free for All

And he certainly has a lot of gall.

Through tables and chairs, it turns into a slugfest,

But a Claymore by McIntyre ends it best.

Your Winner via Pinfall: Drew McIntyre

Daniel Cormier and Tony Hinchcliffe are in the audience because…I don’t care really. They are the Logan Pauls of Mixed Martial Arts.

Tell me when I’m telling lies.

But let us get to a match we all care about, and it is a…

Fatal Four-Way Match for the WWE Intercontinental Championship: Bron Breakker (c) vs. Penta vs. Finn Bálor vs. “Dirty” Dominik Mysterio

This is Penta’s debut at WrestleMania, along with his brother Rey Fenix on Night One, and given the AAA merger announcements, they are in the best position to move lucha libre forward. Plus, it should be noted that “Dirty” Dom is in a match as opposed to his dad, who went out with an injury and wasn’t cleared in time.

In any case, this match just comes right out of the gate as Breakker goes at Penta until the Judgment Day members send him out. Penta comes back and flies outside until Breakker launches at him from the outside with an impressive spear. There were lots of hot spots, including Breakker with a double suplex to a kip up on Penta and Bálor.

Mysterio interjects and gets a suplex with an assist from Bálor. He tries the same with Breakker to no avail, and my friend even remarks via text, “Anytime Bronn connects, or even tries to connect, with a spear, it’s considered attempted murder. This f***ing kid!” Mysterio hits a 619 and BBálor. does him dirty (pardon the pun) with a pin as Penta breaks the count. A Mexican Destroyer by Penta gets a two count for Dom as Carlito comes out to help and tries to set up on the Spanish Announce Desk, until Breakker spears him. The dogs are barking as he spears Penta, but Mysterio follows with the 619. Bálor goes to the high-rent district and delivers the Coup de Grâce, but Mysterio gets dirty with a frog splash for the pin and the win.

Your Winner, and New WWE Intercontinental Champion: “Dirty” Dominik Mysterio

Again, as we roam around the ring, we see Colby Covington, Metro Boomin, and Dean Norris. Before we go full Breaking Bad, Randy Orton comes out and issues an open challenge since Kevin Owens is out due to injury.

So, who will come out?

Say his name and he appears, because I believe your next match is…

Joe Hendry vs. Randy Orton

Hendry is the current TNA Heavyweight Champion, and the fans applaud this as they chant, “We Be-lieve!” As Orton goes for an early RKO, Hendry rolls up for a count of two. The rest of this match is one-sided until Orton attempts the RKO again, but it gets blocked as Hendry reverses with a fall away slam. But you know how this ends as WWE’s Bookey Monkeys™ make it clear that Orton gets an RKO outta nowhere for the three count.

Your Winner via Pinfall: Randy Orton

After the match, Orton gives him props and raises his hand, before delivering another RKO, which leads to my next…

(Author’s Rant: It’s like the spirit of Vince McMahon is booking this match, somewhere up at Anthem some one is shaking their head at this partnership with WWE.)

Now for something no one asked for, here’s…

AJ Styles vs. Logan Paul

Before we get started, I’d like to state the following…

(Author’s Rant or Milagro Manifesto: To quote FAMILY GUY about my feelings on Logan and, to an extension, his brother Jake Paul: “There’s nothing good about what you do or who you are.”

Even my friend remarked via text that he was a Douche Canoe, to which I replied, “No sir. No Douche Canoe [here]. That would imply he has a paddle to row up the river.”

He and his brother are living embodiments of the Power of Douchenozzlery™.)

As for what happened, take a look here:

This is not a knock on Styles’ performance, but this Lucid Luchador Limerick™ best expresses my feelings on this match:

*ahem*

I do not like Logan Paul, Man.

There is nothing to like, as he is a Sham.

Like him and Jake Paul

I will happily watch their fall

Because their brand has as much space as a cockroach’s lifespan.

In any case…

Your Winner via Pinfall: Logan Paul

As for crowd reactions, I must say watching Vanessa Hudgens YEET-ing is a delight.

Last night, Bayley was attacked and is not going to be cleared for tonight’s match. But Valkyria has a partner, and your next match will be for the…

WWE Women’s Tag Team Championship: Liv Morgan and Raquel Rodriguez (c) vs. Lyra Valkyria and Becky Lynch

Yes, Virginia. The Man is back in the WWE, and she is ready to tear down the house.

As Rodriguez gets in The Man’s grill, she unloads, and Lynch sends her packing. She goes after Morgan and tags to Valkyria, and she dives to the outside with a dropkick through the ropes. At one point, Morgan trips up Valkyria on the top rope, and she and Rodriguez place her in Peril. She attempts to fight out and tries to tag Lynch but gets pulled off by Morgan, who chases her and then gets drilled by Rodriguez. Valkyria manages to get out of the corner and gets the hot tag to Lynch, and now The Man is en Fuego and showing no sign of ring rust. She clinches the Dis-Arm-Her, until Rodriguez boots her away. Morgan nails Ob-Liv-Ion for a two count, but ultimately, a Man-Handle Slam by lynch ends it. Therefore…

Your Winners, And New WWE Women’s World Tag Team Champions: Lyra Valkyria and Becky Lynch

The glass breaks and out comes “Stone Cold” Steve Austin riding to the squared circle on an ATV. He lets us know that WWE broke an Allegiant Stadium attendance recard with over 60,000 people on both nights. Of course, he things this deserves a recounts all the solid ass cats in the stadium. After he abandons that idea, Austin cracks some beers of his Broken Skull IPA because that’s the Bottom Line, because…

Yeah, you know the rest.

Now let’s head back ringside to the Main Event, and it is for the…

WWE Undisputed Championship: Cody Rhodes (c) vs. John Cena

At first there were very loud “John Cena Sucks” chants, but it quickly died out as Rhodes comes out to dirt bikers and a sweet winged skull mask, and he hugs her daughter Liberty and wife Brandi along with family at ringside.

Alicia Taylor is once again there with the boxing-style intros. As the bell rings, they lock up, and Rhodes hits a tackle as Cena rolls out of the ring. He gets back in and locks up, and again Rhodes gets the better of him again before he goes out to rethink his strategy. Each time he goes back in, Cena is a step behind until Rhodes dives out. Once they get back in the ring, he pushes Rhodes into the corner and Cena punches him in the head, and he takes his sweet time on the American Nightmare and slows the tempo.

The other interesting thing is that midway through the match, the fans were cheering Cena and booing Rhodes as he staged a comeback until a kick to his head and a clothesline got Cena a two count. Rhodes fires back, but Cena nails a sidewalk slam for another count of two. He drills the Nightmare with two top rope axe handles, until the third timer Rhodes makes him eat a boot and Cena thumbs the eye to cheers(?) for another near fall.

Again, the mood shifts as “Let’s go, Cee-na” chants fill the Stadium as he nails a tornado DDT for a near fall by Cena. A shoulder tackle followed by another, and Cena taunts the champ. He connects with a Prototype(Blue Thunder) bomb and tells Rhodes, “You can’t see him.” Rhodes does for his part and thumbs him in the eye, and gets a slam which follows into a Disaster Kick. He drills Cena with a Cody Cutter and gets a two count. He goes for a bionic elbow, if you will, and Cena trips him and nails the Attitude Adjustment for a two count. Now he connects with the Five Knuckle Shuffle, and the champ squirms out. Rhodes goes up the top turnbuckle and gets tripped up, where Cena gives an avalanche Attitude Adjustment and covers for one, two…no luck there.

Cena goes up for a high-risk maneuver and leaps, but Rhodes stacks him up for a two count. He attempts another Cody Cutter, but Cena kicks out and then hits the Attitude Adjustment and transitions into an STFU. Rhodes fights through and tries to reach the ropes, but Cena pulls him back to the center of the ring and reapplies the submission. Rhodes reaches deep and crawls to the ropes, and as Cena pulls him back, he knocks back into the ref, and he is out like a light. Rhodes delivers the Cross Rhodes and covers, but there’s no one to make the pin count.

He tries to get the ref up, but Cena rips the turnbuckle pads off on the other side and then rams his head to the exposed steel. Another Attitude Adjustmentand now thye ref comes to to count for one, two…no such luck.

The music hits, and coming down to the ring is Travis Scott because…I honestly don’t care. He is the Logan Paul of the Rap World (more so than Drake, in my opinion). In any case the Cross Rhodes finds its mark and Rhodes covers, but Scott pulls the ref out of the ring before the three count. He dares Scott to come in, and he obliges and gives him a Cross Rhodes. However, Cena attempts a sneak attack with the title, and Rhodes blocks and pulls the belt off him. Cena pleads with Rhodes not to strike him, and he tosses the title down, and that’s when he punts him in the…errr, little Rhodes. Another belt shot later, Cena grabs the ref as he counts for one, two, and three.

Your Winner, and New WWE Undisputed Champion: John Cena

With that, Cena has won the top rpize for the 17th time, topping Flair’s sixteen title win as the fans look on while the show draws to a close.

Top Photo: John Cena wins his 17th World title on Night Two of WWE WrestleMania 41 at the Allegiant Stadium in Las Vegas, NV, on April 20, 2025. Courtesy of WWE.

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