Welcome back wrestling friends,
I’m still reeling from Extreme Rules last Saturday, since I missed it on the designated date, I stayed up till 6 a.m. to watch it. I really wanted to view everything. What was your favourite moment of the night? Mine had to be when Bianca Belair retained her title in a ladder match she’s never done before, and she was the most epic of them all.
Ooh, let’s not forget, Bray Wyatt is back. The Fiend. He scared and bothered me growing up, but now I’m strangely fine with it.
The Brawling Brutes won against Imperium, finally leaving them in dirt where they belong. Although, I kept forgetting to breath during the experience because I was too excited. Ha! Oh, silly me.
Our show this week opens with a car accident outside the arena. Karrion Kross is seriously hurt. Drew McIntyre smashes and bashes Kross while officials try to pull Drew away. They succeed just as Drew was about to slam Kross’ head in a car door. “This is just the beginning!” he shouts.
Sami Zayn vs. Kofi Kingston
This match has barely started, and Sami is already making a run for it like he did while fighting Drew McIntyre weeks back. Master strategist, my damn ass. Maybe when he shows it, I’ll stop pushing him over a cliff.
Zayn does try to capitalize by leaping off the top rope for a splash that ultimately turns into a harsh kick to his face by Kingston. Jey looked on at ringside completely bewildered as was I, but one of us was laughing. Guess who?
Kofi climbs the top rope and jumps, but Sami catches him mid air for a Thunderbomb followed by a weird looking roll up that doesn’t grant Zayn the win.
Later on during the match, Jey moves out of the way as Sami pushes Kofi off the turnbuckles and land next to the commentary table almost bumping heads with the main event Uce.
The battle continues on when Xavier Woods felt like telling Jey off about being babysat by Zayn for his anger blowouts, that doesn’t sit right with Jey Jey, so he delivers an impactful Super Kick to Woods’ jaw, sending him tumbling down like a dizzy drunk.
That was the opening Kofi got distracted by, Zayn swoops in and Blue Thunderbombs Kingston, but it wasn’t enough to put him away. Dang.
Another roll up is in place to take Sami out, but Jey pushes Kingston over, the referee didn’t see it, which awarded Sami the win.
Winner: Sami Zayn
Backstage, Rey Mysterio comes on SmackDown to tell Triple H that he quits due to all that’s happened with Dominik since kicking Edge in the balls to joining The Judgement Day to saying he hates his father. My, oh my. What I see is a bunch of unresolved, if any at all, daddy issues.
During puberty, children either go goth, overly sophisticated, jock, It girl and whatnot. Dom went goth, so now we, and I mean me, have to deal with this nonsense. Since it felt rash, Triple H wanted to talk further about it the matter with Mysterio before truly walking out the door.
As we move on from there, Roxanne Perez from NXT 2.0 is on SmackDown as part of choosing her former bestie and tag partner, Cora Jade’s opponent for the upcoming Pick Your Poison event.
Of course, Damage Control, specifically Bayley says that she’s a better pick than Raquel Rodriguez. All I’m hearing is envy and antagonizing whining.
Braun Strowman vs. James Maverick & Thomas – Handicap match
This was hardly a match for these two unknown men, Maverick and Thomas from New Orleans. Braun was smashing, throwing, tossing their asses like weak furniture wearing underwear.
What was really important was when Omos, the Nigerian giant came down from the stairs as a paying member of the public with MVP. Well-dressed and classy, Omos arrived to interrupt Strowman’s nap of a fight. Tease. Tease.
Strowman wins with The Monster Bomb move to finish off his… uh, opponents? “And Braun Strowman easily puts these two jabronis away,” said Micheal Cole. I’m crying with laughter.
Winner: Braun Strowman
Here we thought they were getting along, we were fools for at least five minutes because while Zayn was hyping Solo for his upcoming fatal 4-way match later tonight, he says that he conquered his battle without an assist, which isn’t true.
Jey comes in and reminds Zayn that he guaranteed the win, only for Sikoa to contradict and note that Jey could learn more from Sami. What is this? Hell? Only a somewhat delusional person would say Sami is making headway. I think I’m already there. I’m sensing the paranoia too, Jey Jey.
LA Knight vs. Mansoor
I didn’t know Max Dupri was known as LA Knight in the past… Am I impressed? No, I didn’t watch NXT. But watching tonight, he actually did a great job.
He wanted to prove a point, and he did. Knight scooped Mansoor into the air and drops him, lands hard on his back before exiting on a brief retreat.
Knight follows him outside, but he’s quickly stopped by his sister, Maxxine and former protégé, Macé. LA was too focused on his sibling that he doesn’t see Mansoor charging towards him and giving a little taste in sassy punches because those looked ineffective… to me anyway.
Mansoor was looking for a Side German Suplex, Knight rapidly blokes it by sending his opponent against the turnbuckles then rallies with a neck breaker.
Knight continues with great momentum as he performs a BFT for a win. I thought I heard BLT because I’m hungry. I would have preferred the sandwich.
Winner: LA Knight
Damage Control vs. Raquel Rodriguez, Shotzi & Roxanne Perez – 6-woman tag team match
I’m so happy Perez was on SmackDown. I’ve been watching her wrestle, and I can see real strength, determination and passion for the sport. She joins forces with Rodriguez and Shotzi to try and take down the self-acclaimed best women fighters, Damage Control. For people who love the word mention “control” seem to lack very much.
Perez started this match up strong and ended up shooting from between the ropes to jump Bayley as she hits her back against the commentary table.
Bayley pretends to be in trouble, so Iyo could yank Perez from behind and hit the mat. Michael thought Bayley was in dire need of help, but Wade Barrett knew it to strategy. Look beyond the manipulation you see before you, and you can go far. Cole didn’t. Ha!
Shotzi is tagged in to fight Dakota, and she had her by the neck, Iyo comes in to deliver a kick that doesn’t land because she’s the one on her bum bum. Unfortunately, Kai gives a kick to Shotzi’s face when she wasn’t alert.
Raquel descends on this match with a Fall Away Slam to Bayley, so she retreats to the turnbuckles. Rodriguez charges up to bulldoze Bayley, but surprisingly, Dakota gets in the way. As if that was worth it since they both got whiplashed anyway.
Raquel and Roxanne were about to pull a double team, but Bayley got up too soon and pushed Rodriguez’ spine, disorienting the attempt. So Raquel prepared to deliver the Tahana Bomb, but she’s swept from under and beyond the ring by Sky and Kai.
Since Kai and Iyo took out Raquel, Shotzi eliminates the tag champs as well, leaving Bayley and Roxanne alone in the ring. Perez flips Bayley from the top rope and pins her, yet her opponent kicks out in time.
Bayley was looking for the Rose Plant, Roxanne reverses that, but she’s rapidly placed into a roll up for Damage Control to emerge victorious.
Winners: Damage Control
Hit Row vs. Legado del Fantasma – Tag Team match
Hit Row and Fantasma are old NXT rivals, so I’m betting seeing each other again brought back some fumes. Hence the fact that Dolla and Ashante take the fight to Legado before the bell has even gone off. Y’all love doing that, don’t you?
When order has been established, Dolla and Cruz Deltora from Fantasma start… well, continue this match is more like it. They’ve already sweated.
Top Dolla was having a bit of fun by taking his time with some dance move that are better than Sami’s before dropping an elbow onto Deltora’s chest. Meanwhile outside the ring, Escobar from Fantasma drags Ashante right off the apron, sending him face first against the steel stairs.
B-Fab takes notices and tries to help, while Escobar escapes underneath the ring, Zelina sneaks from behind and close lines B in the throat then proceeds to sack her with fists.
Dolla is in the ring as he gets a jump kick to the chest and a Super Kick to the face with a double team by Fantasma. They win with a move called Sacrificio for an amazing conclusion to their venomous debut. Yes, I said venomous. It’s accurate.
Winners: Legado del Fantasma
Kayla Braxton has an interview with Sonya Deville, Deville is sure that Morgan doesn’t have the “It” factor since losing her title at Extreme Rules and fails after being given opportunity followed by opportunity.
Suddenly, Liv attacks Sonya from behind and ploughs the bullcrap to oblivion with brutal hits to Deville’s face, mid-section and back. What really put it over the edge was when Morgan had Sonya on a table, climbs a metallic rail and Sentons Sonya. I suppose losing makes you realize what’s going, which I think Liv wasn’t aware til after she woke up from her blackout.
Fatal 4-way match for a Intercontinental opportunity
Karrion Kross was supposed to be in this fight, but Drew McIntyre dismantled him too severally that he couldn’t compete.
This fight started off with two very skilled highflying athletes going at each other, and that’s Rey Mysterio and Ricochet. Which left Sheamus and Solo to strangle the other.
Sikoa delivers a wicked Somoa Drop to Sheamus on the ground floor before being pushed into a camera near the announcement table by Rico. That poor cameraman was innocent in all this. That device could’ve broken. Ha! Ha! Ha!
Rey flies from the bottom rope and lands on Sheamus’ abdomen, flattening him like crêpes. Oddly delicious. Now I want crêpes…
Sheamus gets back into this fight as he delivers not 10, but 26 Beats onto Sikoa’s chest while the audience counted in unison. It was fun to participate.
Anyway, Sheamus had Solo in the Clover Leaf position, yet out of nowhere, Jey and Sami come in to disorient Sheamus’ objective. Sikoa gets up in time to Super Kick the Celtic warrior off the mat, so Zayn and Jey could weaken him further. Seeing them taking turns to beat a man was one of the few moments of teamwork you’ll get out of them.
To even the odds, Butch and Holland rush in to save Sheamus, but than Sikoa and Sheamus join in as well as they scatter off screen. I guess the match doesn’t matter anymore? Ha!
Which leaves Mysterio and Ricochet again. Rey has Rico set for the 619, shockingly, his opponent caught him inches from getting his face whipped. Rico attempts to turn it into his advantage, sadly, he took too long, Rey flips him over and Rico lands on his head. Another shot for Mysterio to land a 619 was present before splashing from the top rope for a win.
Mysterio would rather get endlessly chopped by Gunther than fight his son. Sweet and beautiful. Welcome to SmackDown, Rey!
But, be careful. Darkness does tend to stalk…
Winner: Rey Mysterio
Bray Wyatt comes to the ring and addresses the WWE universe. He discussed how lost and vulnerable he truly was, and he lost his way and two people closest to him. Taking some time away gave him the space he needed to find himself again is what he said.
The strange part of this is that while he emoted how thankful, amazed and grateful he was for the fans’ support and the encouragement he was also able to provide to someone else who needed help, there was this glitch that cut him off when he was still speaking… as if that was intentional.
A strange figure wearing a mask is on the Titantron and said “You don’t know who you’re dealing with, but you will. Oh, yes, you will.” That creeped the living hell out of me.
There’s a part of me that believes that was Wyatt.
TOP PHOTO: Bray Wyatt’s return. Courtesy of WWE
