No Quit in this AEW WrestleDream 2025

Tommy "Milagro" Martinez

No Quit in this AEW WrestleDream 2025

This All Elite Wrestling pay-per-view has a lot of promise heading in, with Kris Statlander facing “Timeless” Toni Storm in a rubber match for the AEW Women’s World Championship, and “Hangman” Adam Page defending the AEW World Heavyweight Championship against the Samoan Submission Machine himself, Samoa Joe. But the Main Event will be Darby Allin and Jon Moxley gearing up for an “I Quit” match that suggests ultra violence galore.

Why? Because apparently this is what the AEW “sickos” want. I dunno how to help millennials process their trauma.

And there is a lot to process as we come to you from the Chaifetz Center in St. Louis, MO. To open with the…

Zero Hour: AEW Saturday Tailgate Brawl

Tonya Schiavone is with “Daddy Magic” Matt Menard and Nigel McGuinness as your First Match is…

Roderick Strong and The Conglomeration (Orange Cassidy, Kyle O’Reilly, and Tomohiro Ishii) vs. Death Riders (Claudio Castagnoli, Wheeler Yuta, Daniel Garcia, and PAC)

Already, the fans give a warm, “F*** you, Yu-ta!” as he exudes that “Dirty Dom” heat.

(Hmm, what would be the equivalent? “Grimy Yuta?” “Greasy Yuta?” Someone get on that.)

Also of note, Strong had to be pulled out from the back by O’Reilly, and he looks like he is being dragged to eat vegetables, or recap four-plus hours of a PPV.

(Oh, wait. That’s me.)

The match is standard fare until…

Ads (Seriously?! In the middle of this match. What is this…RAW on NETFLIX?! UGH!!)

The highlight is when Cassidy tags in and goes “whatever,” even though he reverses a stundog to a rear naked choke to a UFO by Castagnoli. The end comes when Ishii gets PAC in a suplex, only to be chop-blocked by Yuta, and PAC delivers the running knee for three.

Your Winners: The Death Riders

Now for…

Eddie Kingston and Hook vs. The Frat House

Huh. No Action Jackson as Hook’s generic theme music hits. Also, here’s a good squash soup recipe to warm you up on those cold autumn nights.

As for the match, Kingston with a backfist and RedRum by Hook end it for these Frat Bros

Your Winners: Eddie Kingston and Hook

Trent and Rocky made their presence known at a tailgate in Boca Raton hosted by AJ and Big Justice, and I care so little.

You can enjoy:

Now for tag team action between…

Harley Cameron and Willow Nightingale vs. Divine Vanity (Megan Bayne and Penelope Ford)

Cameron shows her aggression, or to put it another way, the Divine Vanity “Feel the Rath!” There is nice tag cohesion between Cameron and Nightingale, especially as all four go for the big guns, but it’s Nightingale delivering the Babe with the Powerbomb for the pin and the win

Your Winners: Harley Cameron and Willow Nightingale

That leads to the last match of the Zero Hour, which is…

FTR (Cash Wheeler and Dax Harwood) (with Big Stoke) vs. JetSpeed (“Speedball” Mike Bailey and Kevin Knight)

Schiavone points out there’s 5:35 left in Zero Hour, as FTR attacks at the bell, and this is just a Pier Four brawl. There is a lot of high flying on the outside, and as time ticks away, they go right to …

WrestleDream 2025

Before we continue with the match at hand, allow me an…

(Author’s Rant to TK and the Booker Monkeys™: One word, boys. “Pacing!” Learn it!)

FTR and JetSpeed are still battling it out as Bailey hits an Asai moonsault on FTR to the outside. Wheeler nails Bailey with a Gory Special to the apron edge as Harwood catches Knight in a sharpshooter, and he crawls to the ropes to break the submission. FTR nail the Shatter Machine to Knight, but Bailey breaks up with a 450 double knees. A tag to Bailey, and he and Harwood have a slapfest. All four swing for the fences, and as Bailey suplexes Harwood back in the ring, Stoke grabs his ankles to ensure he cannot kick out, and FTR get the tainted win.

Your Winners: FTR

Excalibur joins the commentary, and Schiavone is at ringside with Charlie Thesz, the wife of former NWA champion Lou Thesz, and she thanks AEW for having her at ringside.

He also announces the next match is…

Jamie Hayter vs. Thekla

Everyone is banned from the ringside, and this is a slugfest at the start. Hayter is in control until Thekla stops the momentum and lands a crossbody to the floor. The Toxic Spider is in control until she gives a back elbow to an exploder suplex, followed by a missile dropkick. Thekla catches Hayter in a variation of the Octopus stretch, but she escapes the submission with a backbreaker. Thekla still has wrist control and goes for the Koji Clutch, and Hayter gets a foot in the ropes to break the hold. Thekla spider crawls away, but she drinks the Hayterade, so…

Your Winner via Pinfall: Jamie Hayter

Personally, this could have been at Zero Hour, and we learn it was supposed to be, but the FTR/JetSpeed match ran over.

Again…PACING!!

Well, let’s go to the next match between…

Jurassic Express (Jack Perry and Luchasaurus) vs. The Young Bucks (Matt Jackson and Nick Jackson)

The winners receive a $500,000 cash prize, and it’s especially funny because the intro lists the Bucks’ transactions and expenses. Since they are running in the red, they get listed as the “$32.17 Bucks.”

Ha!

Perry channels his inner Kraven with his ring gear (look it up, kids), and big chants for “Luchasaurus” after a long absence. As for Perry, he’s definitely not a Scapegoat, as he and Luchasaurus showcase their tag team action. There is lots of high-flying, high-octane action, and the fans get in on the act, chanting “ Ohhhhh, you got no money!” at the Bucks to the tune of “Sven Nation Army.”

Double HA!!

Perry gets in a spot of bother, but a hot tag to Luchasaurus, and the Big Dino is en Fuego. Big moves abound by both teams, including a Fear Factor to Perry, but he kicks out at the two count. A BTE finds the mark to Perry, and Luchasaurus breaks the pin count. Jurassic Express nails a Doomsday Device, and they only get a two-count on Matt. Now, a TK Driver to Matt for a taste of their medicine, but Nick breaks the count. Jurassic Express wins with the Countdown to Extinction to earn the extra cash, which means…

Your Winners via Pinfall: Jurassic Express

and

Your Broke Bitches: The $32.17 Bucks

After the match, Perry and Luchasaurus extend their hands in a show of respect and offer the cash, but Josh Alexander, Mark Davis, and Lance Archer strike, and The Bucks want no part in this. But the music hits, and Kenny Omega steps out, eyes the Bucks, and goes after the Family, but the numbers catch up until Jurassic Express gets back to even the odds.

We get a promo on what led to the next match, which is a…

Tornado Trios Match: The Hurt Syndicate (Bobby Lashley, Shelton Benjamin, and MVP) vs. The Demand (Ricochet, Bishop Kaun, and Toa Liona)

Oh, it’s a number one contender match, to boot, so…yeah. There’s that.

The Demand jumps The Hurt Syndicate, and business is booming in and outside the ring.

But there is too much to cover, and let us address this with a Lucid Luchador Limerick in Review™:

*ahem*

Ricochet and Crew leave them in Agony

And the Hurt Syndicate was starting to look raggedy.

Yet, Benjamin and Lashley rebound

With solid offense abound

And business is booming for the Syndicate, Baby

Your Winners via Pinfall: The Hurt Syndicate

But let’s get to title action, and this next match is for the…

AEW TNT Championship: Kyle Fletcher (c) vs. Mark Briscoe

No Callis at Fletcher’s side coming down the ring, but he joins the commentary. Big chants for “Dem Boys” as the fans are behind Briscoe.

Nice back-and-forth exchange to start, and The Protostar is showing off his mettle. Briscoe launches into Fletcher on the outside, and he shows him how things are done on the chicken farm in Sussex County. He gets a chair and uses it to launch himself, but Fletcher takes it away, but that doesn’t stop a dropkick through the ropes. Briscoe props him up in the chair, and he launches between the ropes for a spinning senton on the champ.

He attempts another somersault senton, but Fletcher moves at the last minute. He maneuvers the steel steps and powerbombs Briscoe flat on his back, and things favor the Protostar, but he can’t put Briscoe down. Fletcher comes back with a snap dragon suplex to a powerbomb, and Briscoe kicks out. Now he attempts a super brainbuster, but Briscoe floats over, and they jockey for position. Fletcher nails the superplex but can’t capitalize as both men are spent. Outside the ring, Briscoe hits a Jay Driller on the apron edge, then climbs up and follows for a Froggy ‘bow, but there was no water in the pool. They set up on the top rope, and Fletcher gets knocked silly, lying on the rope as Briscoe hits the Froggy ‘bow on the rope and outside and inside the ring to cover, but only gets a near fall. They unload the big guns, and Briscoe connects with the Jay Driller, but Fletcher gets a finger on the bottom rope to break the pin. Briscoe gets shoved to the ref, and Fletcher punts him in the…err, little chickens and follows with a sheer drop brain buster that gets a two count. Fletcher digs deep and delivers the BRAINBUSTAHHH on the top rope to retain the title.

Your Winner, and Still AEW TNT Champion: Kyle Fletcher

After the match, members of The Conglomeration come out to support and help Briscoe back to the ring.

A quick vignette leading up to who is the best in the women’s division: The Galaxy’s Greatest, or The Timeless One.

We will find out as this match is for the…

AEW Women’s World Championship: Kris Statlander (c) vs. “Timeless” Toni Storm

It’s the Cosmic Killer versus the Timeless One in a rubber match to see who is the best in the Women’s division. Storm has some heavy pancake makeup, and McGuiness quips at one point that she is like a “Mix of the Joker and the Phantom of the Opera.”

Pretty accurate.

They lock up, and neither has the advantage. They exchange hold-for-hold until Storm nails the champ with a hip attack on the outside. Statlander responds with a monkey flip to the edge, and she follows with a moonsault on the floor. She hoists her to a fireman’s carry, dumps Storm in the ring, and a springboard leg drop gets a two count. Statlander goes for a body scissors to the midsection, but Storm fights out until she eats a clothesline.

Statlander comes back with a corner spinning tornillo until Storm counters with a snap suplex and then nails a Tiger Driver for a two count. She goes for a hammerlock and still can’t put the champ away. Statlander comes back with an elevated facebuster and ties her up in a submission until Storm gets her boot on the ropes. She gets the champ in a chicken wing, and she manages to break the hold as well. Both women throw bombs, and it’s Storm with a hip attack into a Storm Zero, but Statlander protects her head from the impact and hits a basement dropkick to a 450 splash, but only gets a two count. Another Storm Zero, and the Cosmic Killer still kicks out. Statlander fires back with a discus lariat to the Saturday Night Fever and cinches a Fujiwara armbar/body scissors combo. Storm fights through the pain until Statlander lands another Saturday Night Fever to end the match emphatically.

Your Winner via Pinfall, and Still AEW Women’s Champion: Kris Statlander

They both embrace as Statlander stands alone in the ring. Then the music hits, and the CEO, Mercedes Moné, comes out to upstage her. She congratulates her but tells Statlander to step out of her ring. She obliges for now, as Moné asks who’s ready to ride the Money Train. Mina Shirikawa comes out to answer the call.

Justin Roberts gives the boxing style intros for this impromptu match, and it is a…

Winner Take all Match: Mercedes Moné(c)(TBS Champion) vs. Mina Shirikawa(c)(Ring of Honor Interim Women’s champion)

I wish this had more of a build-up, but I guess we need to throw this on because…Ehh, I don’t care about the reason.

For now, enjoy this Squared Circle Clerihew™:

*Ahem*

The CEO is nonplussed

by this upstart with the healthy bust.

After a backslider,

Moné is on fire.

Your Winner via Pinfall: Mercedes Moné

After the match, Statlander interrupts her celebration. A slam later, she stares down the CEO, and this is far from over.

Speaking of drama, your next match is for the…

AEW World Tag Team Championship: Brodido (Bandido and Brody King) (c) vs. Don Callis Family (Kazuchika Okada and Konosuke Takeshita) (with Don Callis)

Commentary points out that Takeshita recently won the IWGP Heavyweight title in New Japan, and that has to be a point of contention as he and Okada stare daggers at each other.

Bandido offers a hand, and Okada says he’s number one…bitch.

Again, because pacing is not key to this promotion, I need to do another Lucid Luchador Limerick in Review™:

*ahem*

Brodido looks to be on cue,

Even when Takeshita and Okada seem to be askew.

They give the champs damage,

But Brodido somehow managed

To get the win. (Hey, who knew?)

Your Winners and Still AEW World Tag Team Champions: Brodido

Best part, King does the Macarena with Bandido, and you need to save that as your meme going forward.

Renee Paquette is backstage with Storm, who stares into space like a zombie until Shirikawa comes over to comfort her. They may have lost everything, but they have each other.

Time for the first of your double Main Event, and this is for the…

AEW World Heavyweight Championship: “Hangman” Adam Page (c) vs. Samoa Joe

Justin Roberts gives the boxing-style intros, highlighting both men’s accolades

The bell rings and Joe powers him in the corner as fans chant “Joe’s gonna kill you” mixed with “Cowboy S***!” Joe tackles Page outside the ring, and he taunts the champ until Page comes back on offense and gives him an armbar from the top rope.

From there, it’s chops ahoy, and Joe explodes with a back elbow. Outside the ring, he sets Page on a chair and nails a running boot. Page responds as he gives a lariat to Joe and goes for a moonsault, but Joe runs in and goes for the attack. A moonsault misses, but Page catches Joe flush in the ribs with a shotgun dropkick. He runs right into an ST Joe and proceeds to wipe his boot before nailing a facewash. Joe goes for a series of offensive moves, including a senton slam, but only gets a near fall. Page fires back with chops and then runs to a powerslam, but Joe can’t keep him down. A series of punches fire up the Hangman, and they exchange blows and suplexes. He goes up top for a moonsault press that connects with Joe, but not enough for a pin. Joe hits a powerbomb for two and switches seamlessly to an STF. As Page tries to reach the ropes, Joe switches to an armbar, but the champ gets a boot on the rope to break the submission.

He sets him up top and lights up his chest with chops, but Page reverses to a sunset powerbomb and almost puts him away. Now they pull out all the stops as a Buckshot Lariat is countered with a Coquina Clutch. Page fights through and gets to the ropes to force the break. Joe goes for the Musclebuster, but Page counters with the Dead Eye for a two count. Page loads up and blasts Joe with not one, not two, but three Buckshot Lariats to make him stay down.

Your Winner via Pinfall, and Still AEW World Heavyweight Champion: Adam Page

After the match, Powerhouse Hobbs and Kentsuyori Shibata come out to help their leader as fans chant Joe’s name, and they give him an embrace in a show of respect. As he approaches Page, he clotheslines him while The Opps hold him to be clocked by the title. Joe delivers a Musclebuster to Page on the belt as the fans boo him out of the arena.

Meanwhile, because somebody cares, Moné is upset that Statlander interrupted her moment and wants to come for her title at Full Gear.

WOW. The nerve. The audacity. The gumption.

I can’t think of anything more brutal than that.

Oh, wait. I can, and that is the last match, as Justin Roberts explains the stipulation is an…

“I Quit” Match: Darby Allin vs. Jon Moxley (with Marina Shafir)

Forget finesse. This is a war of attrition as Allin comes out with a backpack o’ plunder.

The bell rings, and Allin pulls out the flag he raised at Mt. Everest as fans chant “AEW” as Mox wipes his feet on it. We’re off to the races, as he dropkicks Mox to the outside and unloads. Shafir grabs his leg, and Mox nails him with a dropkick.

He yells at him to say the words, and Allin has his teeth in the middle rope. Mox kicks it, making one wonder if it damaged his teeth. Then he grabs a chain around his fist, punches him, and then pulls his head up to the middle rope, which bloodies his ear. Mox breaks him down piece by piece, and Shafir goes under the ring and comes out with some bamboo skewers. Mox takes one and digs it into his fingernail. Chants of “You sick f***!” echo in the arena as he whips him to the stairs, and Allin leaps over and nails Mox with a dropkick. Back in the ring, Allin connects with a Code Red, grabs the flag, and chokes Mox with it. He gouges Allin’s eye, and he is disoriented. He attempts a Coffin Drop, but Shafir moves him just in time as he hits the apron edge. Mox undoes Allin’s belt and whips him like the proverbial government mule. A piledriver later, and Allin defies him at every turn, and even when he fights back, he eats a German suplex by Mox.

Now, Allin sprays lighter fluid in his face. The Death Riders rush out, and Allin sprays them, too. Mox digs into the bag and finds a taser. He Stalk allin and thrusts it, but Allin manages to block him. Shafir comes from behind with a low blow, and Mox sets up a chair and drives him skull-first with a Death Rider DDT and cinches a bulldog choke, but Allin is still conscious and defiantly gives him double middle fingers. Castagnoli picks him up and tosses Allin to the commentary table with a sickening thud. Then PAC drags him to he opposite end of the ring, and Mox lands another high Death Rider to a table set outside.

Fans chant “This is Murder!” as well as “You can’t kill him!” to further taunt Moxley. Then, The Death Riders bring in canisters of water and pour in into an aquarium. They throw Allin in the ring and push his head in the water, and he still won’t give up. Before this becomes a bigger violation of the Geneva Convention, the lights go out and then…

Waitaminute! It’s STING!!!

He beats off the Death Riders with the bat and then tosses it to Allin. Shafir gets in his grill, and he carries her to the back.

Mox dares him to swing at him, and he obliges. He wraps the flag around his throat, hits the Scorpion Death Drop, followed by a Coffin Drop. Allin cinches the Scorpion Deathlock, and Mox says those two words to end the match.

Your Winner via Submission: Darby Allin

Allin stands tall as the Death Riders run to the back with their tail tucked between their legs as the PPV draws to a close.

In recent news, Mercedes Mone is to host a special segment on the October 22 episode of Dynamite to celebrate her winning a twelfth title.

Dave Meltzer has now released his star ratings for the 2025 edition of AEW WrestleDream.

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