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WWE Crown Jewel PLE has some shine, but not a lot of luster

Tommy "Milagro" Martinez

Cody Rhodes wins the Inaugural Crown Jewel title at the Crown Jewel PLS. Courtesy of WWE.

Welcome, and Salaam from Saudi Arabia. World Wrestling Entertainment is back to add two more Crown Jewels to this Premium Live Event. We will not crown one, but two, champions as it will be Nia Jax and Morgan in a champion versus champion match, and Cody Rhodes faces his toughest challenge in the Ring General, Gunther.

Oh, and there are other matches, too.

We come to you from the Mohammed Abdo Arena in Riyadh, Saudi Arabia. Michael Cole and Corey Graves have the call, and your First Match of the Night is between…

Roman Reigns and Jimmy Uso vs. The Bloodline (Solo Sikoa, Tama Tonga, Jacob Fatu)

There were many OTC chants in Riyadh, but then the “Main Event” Jey Uso came out through the crowd, and now we have an even match.

Tonga steps in with Jey and gets vicious early on, but the Main Event fights back and tags in Jimmy with some old-school double-team elbow drops.  Then Fatutags in but The Usos have some fun with their cousin.  The Bloodline powder out to restrategize, and Fatu gets back in the fight.  after some friendly fire between Jimmy and Jey, Sikoa tags in and picks away at Jimmy and they cut the ring in half to make him a Uce in Peril until he fights out and tags in Jey.  While the Saudi crowd is cheering on, let me ask…

(Why is “YEET” a word?  Honestly?!)

Fatu comes back in with a Samoan drop on Jey and he is an Uce in Peril.  Jey fights out and then it’s a hot tag to Reigns and he is an Original Tribal Chief en Fuego.  He and Sikoa go at it and ultimately nails the Superman punch.  Sikoa manages the Asiatic Spike to cover but Jimmy breaks the count.  It’s pandemonium between the Bloodline and the OTC team until Sikoa gets in the Asiatic Spike for the pin and the win.

Your Winners:  The Bloodline

The Bloodline maul the OTC and the USOs, and they try to break them down until Sami Zayn gets in the ring. Sikoa gestures to join him, and Zayn embraces The false chief…and launches him in a suplex

Sikoa powders out with The Bloodline and they go for the attack.  Zayn accidentally hits the OTC and after that, Jimmy is hot as Jey tries to make peace this matter is far from resolved between them and the Honorable Uce.

As for what’s next, I am resolved to cover since it is a…

Crown Jewel 2024

Fatal four-way match for the WWE Women’s Tag Team Championship: Jade Cargill and Bianca Belair (c) vs. Damage CTRL (Kairi Sane and Iyo Sky) vs. Meta-Four (Lash Legend and Jakara Jackson) vs. Chelsea Green and Piper Niven

Yeah, this seems like an appropriate time for a Lucid Luchador Limerick in Review™:

*Ahem*

Four teams challenge for the women’s tag team title

And neither one was idle.

Bodies were flown around

And many a big move did abound.

But it’s Cargill and Belair who ensure their title claim is rightful.

Your Winners and Still WWE Women’s Tag Team Champions:  Jade Cargill and Bianca Belair

So…that happened.

And the next thing to happen is…

Seth “Freakin” Rollins vs. Bronson Reed

Say what you will, but Saudi Arabia is hot for Rollins.  Reed is not far behind and comes out with a sweet MF DOOM singlet.

Rollins goes up the ramp to brawl and Reed meets with heavy hands.  They finally go to the ring and Rollins comes back with a tope suicida (not a “suicide dive,” Cole. Stop listening to the voice in your headphones).  Now the bell rings and Reed is in control and gives Rollins a Tsunami.  He comes back and nails a stomp that finds the mark for a two.  Rolins goes for a Pedigree but Reed fights out.  The big man stymies Rollins, but he fights back and gets a splash for a one count.   A spinning sit-out powerbomb gets two for Reed but he can’t put away Rollins.  He goes for a superplex to Rollins and covers for a count of two

Rollins gets in his grill and says, “Finish me!  You have the chance!”  Reed takes that to heed and goes up the top turn turnbuckle, but Rollins rolls away to the other side. Reed goes up and Rollins gets out of the ring to catch a breath.  They brawl to the outside and Reed grabs the steps and misses the mark.   Rollins comes back with a stomp to the steps and rolls him on.  hey continue to battle but it’s Rollins with a stomp that gets the win.

Your Winner via Pinfall:  Seth Rollins

There is a little blood by Reed 0and he stares a hole at Rollins, so this feud is gonna last for a while.

Now for the first match to crown the…

Singles match for the Inaugural WWE Women’s Crown Jewel Championship: Liv Morgan (Raw’s Women’s World Champion) vs. Nia Jax (SmackDown’s WWE Women’s Champion)

Mike Rome is here with the boxing-style intros, and…

(yeah, you know how I’m gonna run.  So let’s jump to my patented Haiku in Review™:

*Ahem*

Morgan tries her best

Against powerhouse Nia Jax.

Oblivion wins.

Your Winner of the Women’s Crown Jewel Championship:  Liv Morgan

Oh, yeah, there was a point Tiffany Stratton tried to interfere, and Raquel Rodriguez got involved.

Triple H makes an appearance and gives the inaugural belt to Morgan for the win. 

Now for some violence with…

Randy Orton vs. Kevin Owens

This match came about because…eh, who cares?  The point is  Owens enters with a “‘Cowboy’ Bob Orton” shir for that sweet heat.  It’s not quite “Dusty Sucks Eggs” but it has the same effect.

Owens attacks with a chair and the action spills to the outside and they brawl on the floor.  Once they get back in the ring, Owens stuns the official and Orton works him over.  The WWE officials get involved including Adam Pearce and Nick Aldis and Orton stuns Pearce.  They brawl into the Saudi crowd and then Owens gets back on offense and nails a moonsault to Orton on the Commentary and then…

Ads (You Stupid Monkeys in the Truck™! I just want the match to go on. Do not treat me like I’m watching RAW! I have neither the time nor the patience!!!)

Well, that means…

No winner because Idiot Booker Monkeys™

So let’s go to the next match for the…

Triple Threat Match for the WWE United States Championship: LA Knight (c) vs. Andrade vs. Carmelo Hayes

Again, this is a big deal because…eh, who cares?

Hayes and Andrade start as Knight looks on,  but they realize the title is on the line and they superkick the champ.  Then they send Andrade out, anf Knight grabs Hayes and slams him to the commentary table.  Andrade comes back in and nails a second rope Spanish Fly to Knight for a two count

Knight hangs on to get the pin and the win.  Therefore…

Your Winner and Still United States Champion:  L A Knight (YeAHHH)

Now for the Main Event for the…

WWE Crown Jewel Championship: Gunther (Raw’s World Heavyweight Champion) vs. Cody Rhodes (SmackDown’s Undisputed WWE Champion)

We get boxing-style intros from Mike Rome.  Once that’s done and the bell rings, they go for the grappling and neither man gets the advantage.  Pretty soon, Rhodes channels his dad but Gunther stops the flip-flop and fly.  Rhodes gets on top with a step-up enzugiri, but Gunther locks on with a sleeper.  They tumble outside and battle outside the ring.  Gunther establishes dominance while “Ole” chants continue.  After a superplex by Gunter, Rhodes shifts the narrative by channeling Dusty with a bionic elbow to Gunther.  Once the “Dusty” chants die down, he lands a cutter to Gunther for a two count.  He goes for the Beautiful Disaster and Gunther catches him for a Boston crab and Rhodes gets to the bottom ropes for him to release the hold.  Gunther switches to a sleeper but The American Nightmare escapes and lands a CrossRhodes but can’t capitalize.  Gunther connects with a dropkick and a powerbomb but gets a two count.   Gunther gives him the bad mouth until the champ fires back with a back suplex to Gunther and he nails a clothesline.  Rhodes connects with the CrossRhodes for another two count.  Rhodes goes for a super cutter, and Gunther catches in a sleeper.  However, the American Nightmare maneuvers The Ring General to a pin and he gets the one, two, and three.

Your Winner, and Inaugural Crown Jewel Champion:   Cody Rhodes

After the match, they shake hands and Triple H awards Rhodes the inaugural belt as awarded by the Saudis. Morgan joins the fun as the show draws to a close.

Top Photo:  Cody Rhodes wins the Inaugural Crown Jewel title at the Crown Jewel PLS. Courtesy of WWE.

WWE Crown Jewel 2024: November 2, 2024

Final Thoughts:

 

Not a bad show, but nothing memorable, either.

Kudos to Morgan and Rhodes on their wins.  The rest of this PLE could have been an email…or an episode of WWE RAW.

Until then, see ya next WWE PLE!

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