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RAW: Dom breaks Liv’s heart

Thomas Starr

 

Monday Night Raw is live from Green Bay. The WWE saw fit to advertise The Final Testament vs. Otis, Xavier Woods, and Tozawa ahead of time, but not Dragunov vs. Breakker. I am already confused.

Gunther is out first. This is the first time I have heard Gunther yell. He saved it for calling Damien Priest and the fans “bums.” He reiterates that Priest and the Judgement Day are “street trash.” Then tells Priest to come out and hand over the belt and go back to the “trailer park.” Priest skips the verbal battle and blasts Gunther in the face. Security tries to separate them leading to security gathering like quails and catching one of their friends when Priest threw him over the top rope. They fight into the break.

Jackie Redmond is backstage trying to interview Gunther, but Priest attacks again.

Bron Breakker vs. Ilja Dragunov – Winner gets an Intercontinental Title Shot at SummerSlam

Dragunov is ultra intense to start. He hits Breakker with a great looking running knee. They are laying in the strikes. Illja and Bron go to the top turnbuckle and tease suplexing each other to the floor. Instead, Bron drops Ilja on the ringpost. That was an incredible bump. Dragunov is selling his midsection. Ilja hit a superplex into an H-Bomb for a nearfall. He then did a Death Valley Driver on the ring apron and tried to hit another H-Bomb, but Breakker speared him in midair. Ilja is counted out. Wow!

Winner: Bron Breakker

Rhea wants her title back at SummerSlam. Dominik asks about Rhea Ripley talking to Jey Uso. She tells Dom she has been watching his interactions with Liv Morgan online. Yikes. Finn Balor tries to talk Dom into facing Jey despite Rhea’s protests.

Adam Pearce is backstage with Drew McIntyre. They shake hands and say they have a deal. Hmmm.

The Bird Lady Without A Gimmick (Lyra Valkyria) enters as we go to break. Seriously, can we learn something about her? Why does she dress like that? What does it mean to her?

Back from break, Otis and Xavier Woods are celebrating Tozawa’s birthday. Damien Priest and Gunther have been sent home after their brawl. Kayden Carter and Katana Chance are fake talking to Lyra in the ring. Seriously, it looked so silly.

Lyra Valkyria vs. Sonya Deville

Katana and Kayden try, in vain, to get the crowd to chant for Lyra. Yikes. This looks like a fight. Michael Cole runs down Sonya’s grappling credentials which kinda, sorta explains why she is with Shayna and Zoey, but not really. Both women could use some character development and, I do not know, maybe explain Sonya joining the other two?

Lyra hits a superplex and Katana and Kayden are finally able to get the crowd into the match. Shayna distracts the referee and Zoey knocks Lyra off the top rope. Sonya wins with the Deville’s Advocate. A little klunky, but I liked the match. Just give us a reason to cheer Lyra. Please.

Winner: Sonya Deville

Another VHS tape this time with the “Witch-like woman” as Cole describes her. Uncle Howdy says he is the answer. The unidentified woman screams. And that is it. What was that?

CM Punk is walking backstage. Drew is also in the building. Here. We. Go.

Jelly Roll is performing at SummerSlam. It is nice they include a segment for the audience to get refreshments.

Punk is out to a huge pop. Wow! The crowd reaction is intense. He has pink shoes on and wants to put Drew’s blood on them. He announces he has been cleared and calls for Drew to come to the ring. Punk is taping his fists as Drew comes out.

Drew says nothing is going to stop him from getting in the ring. Except…he does not want to. That was hilarious. He says Green Bay is not big enough for their match. Drew taunts Punk with the bracelet he stole.

Adam Pearce confirms Punk vs. McIntyre at SummerSlam! He adds a stipulation that they cannot touch each other before SummerSlam. Then says he has a referee problem, which brings out Seth Rollins. Seth has on a ridiculous green…coat? I do not know what that is.

Rollins says that because of the chaos Drew and Punk have caused, no one wants to be in the ring with them. Except him. Seth is the special referee at SummerSlam.

Judgement Day are backstage searching for Jey Uso like teenagers trying to sneak back into the house after curfew. Poor Dom runs into Liv again. She tells him everything will be okay.

https://twitter.com/WWE/status/1815555623246791060

Sami Zayn is in the back with Jackie. He says he is taking Bron very, very seriously. Sami tells Bron to do the same. Nice promo.

Sami hears something across from them. He finds Judgement Day beating up Jey Uso and Sami helps fight them off. Sami at one point even hits the camera with his elbow. They were throwing some heat. Nice segment.

The Final Testament vs. Otis, Xavier Woods, and Tozawa

If you need any refreshments or to pick some dirt out of your toenails now is the time. I am still flabbergasted that they advertised this match, but not Breakker and Ilja. Apparently, The Final Testament has been recruiting Xavier Woods. Why? I have no idea. This feud seems like it has been going on for ten years.

Karrion Kross is with Tokka and Rahzar. Rahzar no-sells Woods early. Tokka is not so lucky. He not only sells for Woods, but Tozawa too. Yikes. Happy birthday, Tozawa. Tozawa rips off his shirt as we go to break.

Back from break, Scarlett and Maxxine are dressed to kill. Karrion Kross does the helicopter spin with Tozawa. Tozawa finally hits the hot tag to Otis and the crowd explodes. Otis is over!

Tokka has to sell for Otis’s ridiculous caterpillar. Who did he anger to have to sell so much for these guys? Karrion Kross does some stuff and gets the win. So this never-ending feud continues.

Winners: The Final Testament

Chad Gable and The Creed Brothers are out as Otis and company are recovering in the ring. And we go to break.

Gable says he has picked some better pupils. He says using his brain is not Otis’s strong point. Gable asks Otis to rejoin the team. So he calls them losers and morons, but wants them back? Why? He then offers protection from the Wyatt Sicks. Otis tells Gable no. Big pop from the crowd.

The Creed Brothers attack Otis and Tozawa, but Otis smashes them both. He is about to get his hands on Gable, but the Creeds stop him and throw him into the ring post. Otis takes a heck of a bump into the side of the ring. Gable hands out chairs when…lights out. Wyatt Sicks in the house.

Do they have their smoke machine with them? The crowd is chanting something obscene. And yes the smoke machine is back. Do the Wyatt Sicks have to carry that thing in themselves? As the Creeds wait for the Rabbit, The Witch, and the Wardrobe, Uncle Howdy gives Gable the Sister Abigail. And we go to break.

https://twitter.com/WWE/status/1815562775394947418

“Big” Bronson Reed vs. Pete Dunne

They setup this match last week when Dunne cost Bronson the match against Sheamus. Pat McAfee says no one understands why Dunne attacked Bronson and Sheamus last week. To be honest, it does not make sense.

Sheamus kicks Dunne in the mush before the match even starts. He clears the ring. Thanks for coming, Bronson.

Winner: Match never started.

Rhea wants to know what happened to JD and Finn. They say they jumped Jey and Sami made the save. Finn says he asked Adam Pearce for a match with Jey and Sami for tonight. When Rhea finds out Dom was with Liv, she drags him to the ring. And another break.

Jackie Redmond is in the back with Sheamus. He is also confused why Dunne is attacking him. That makes all of us. He tells Dunne they can either go drinking or have a match. Okay.

Rhea pushes Dom to the ring. I did not mention Maxxine Dupri’s shoes earlier, but they were fantastic. Rhea’s are awesome too, which is why I bring it up. You are welcome.

Rhea calls Liv out, but she is in the crowd. Liv is in some Daisy Dukes short shorts. She says gorgeous men like Dom do not go for girls like Rhea. They go for girls like Liv and then Liv does a twirl and shows the back of her short shorts. I am just doing the play-by-play.

Liv wants Dom to say the three little words. Dom says, “I hate you, Liv!” That is four words. Just for the record. He says a lot of mean things in Spanish. Liv fake cries, which is some cable access level acting. Rhea licked Dom as Liv cried.

This whole angle is well done, but also uncomfortable when you consider they are under investigation from the federal government for sexual misconduct.

Zelina Vega vs. Zoey Stark

Cathy Kelley interviews Zelina. Zelina’s arm is injured, but she is going to show everyone what she is made of. Pat McAfee says, “#PushZelina.” What? Is that really trending?

So, we still do not know why Sonya is with Zoey and Shayna, but their gimmick seems to be beating up every undercard woman on the roster. Okay. That is something. I guess.

If they are going to have these kinds of matches, how about doing some character development? This is the second women’s match that they have not given us any information about who these women are. You have three hours. At least try.

Very sloppy early on. Zoey drops Zelina’s arm on the top rope as we go to break.

Back from break, you can clearly hear Zoey calling spots. For whatever reason, they left the camera on Zoey as she was talking to Zelina. It took a while.

Sonya distracts the ref as Shayna interferes. Katana, Kayden, and Lyra come out to help Zelina. While the ref watched the chaos, Zelina hit Zoey with her arm brace and hit Code Red for the win.

Winner: Zelina

Xavier Woods asks Adam Pearce for a match against Karrion Kross next week. Thank goodness. I hope this feud goes on for another six months or so.

Drew comes up to Pearce. He tells Pearce he could have told him about Seth being the referee. Pearce says Seth, Drew, and Punk will be together next week as Seth gives Drew and Punk his referee instructions. Okay. Drew asks, “What does that even mean?” Hilarious.

Isla Dawn and Alba Fyre are backstage with Jackie Redmond. Another team that we know nothing about. Sonya, Zoey, and Shayna interrupt and tell them they will be taking their titles.

Gunther video package reliving the story between Priest, McIntyre, Punk and Rollins. He promises to bring the title to new levels. He is bringing back prestige to the title. Good video.

Sami and Jey are in the concourse area getting ready for their entrance. A fan hands them some of those big foam hands with Yeet written on them. Sami and Jey put them on and do the secret handshake.

Jey Uso and Sami Zayn vs. JD McDonagh and Finn Balor

Sami does a springboard moonsault from the apron to the floor. He lands on McDonagh and Balor. Moments later, Dom distracts the ref so Carlito can interfere. That is not cool.

Back from break, JD and Finn are in control of Sami. He gets the hot tag to Jey who clears house. Yeet.

Finn and JD turn the tide on Jey until he hits a superkick and gets the hot tag to Sami. Sami is ready to give the Helluva kick, but Dom grabs his leg. Jey and Sami hit the 1 D but Balor makes the save. Sami hits the Helluva kick and dives to the floor. Jey then hits the Uso Splash for the win.

Winners: Jey Uso and Sami Zayn

Afterwards, Bron Breakker hits a spear on Sami. As Bron backs down the aisle a fan tells him that was a cheap shot. Haha.

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