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SmackDown: Orton RKOs Reigns

I have a list of arrogant people in my head that just keeps stacking up almost every month as time goes by, fictional characters or real individuals, it doesn’t matter. In this case, Roman Reigns is one of those people on my list. I hope that’s unsurprising to most of you. Ha!

The fact that he believes he’s appearance is meant to put everything in order like he expected Solo and Jimmy to do last week would make any difference on the final decision he’s three competitors have set in stone. Girl, I want my Fatal 4-Way.

Despite that, Sikoa says he’ll fix it.

As we open the night, our four wrestlers for the Undisputed Championship at the Royal Rumble enter the stage to sign the contract that will solidify the match. Anytime someone introduces Reigns to the ring as the Champion, it sounds like a mouthful. Ha! I could nearly choke just by saying it.

Roman was supposed to make his entrance, yet Paul Heyman shows up alone instead. Since Heyman and Roman just arrived, they didn’t have the time to send the contract to a solicitor yet. Ha! Therefore, the abrupt consensus is that Reigns won’t sign the contract.

I absolutely love Nick Aldis. Since Roman doesn’t want to sign, Aldis already has three signatures that can green light the match regardless in a 3-Way for the VACANT title spot. That forced Heyman to make a double take. Aldis’ ruthless, no nonsense way of running the blue brand is exactly what we needed.

Heyman kept blabbing on and on about how Roman runs this company, so naturally LA Knight shuts him up… finally. This should be his one-on-one rematch since the rest of The Bloodline saved Reigns from losing at Crown Jewel, but instead we have AJ and Randy here as well. I may not mind, but clearly, it bothers LA Knight.

Styles is pissed that Knight thinks a few mere months away shouldn’t grant him the chance to be part of this matchup. AJ simply and honestly doesn’t like the fact that Knight walked over his body in order to get his match with Reigns. It eats at him severally every day.

Orton is in the background, not saying a word as he watches these two bicker. Ha! This is Heyman’s doing. He wants to waste time, and they gobbled it up. So it’s not a shock when they start fighting leaving Aldis to personally get involved before other officials came on the scene.

I do love it when they’re fuming, much to the delight of Heyman. Luckily, Orton is smart enough to see the cunning tactics behind Heyman’s descent, and it’s not going to work. Why? Because Randy is going to beat Solo Sikoa later tonight then reintroduce Roman to the three most dangerous letters known to all sports entertainment. RKO.


Santos Escobar, Angel Garza & Humberto vs. Carlito, Joaquin Wilde & Cruz Del Toro – 6-man Tag Team match


Santos, Humberto and Angel have decided to take up the theme music that was previously used when Escobar, Wilde and Del Toro were together. Legado del Fantasma. Or even Legado World Order real soon.

Legado del Fantasma were laughing at first when Angel manages to strike Carlito from behind, but he quickly bounces back with a clothesline to the throat of his adversary. Those obnoxious smiles are gone now. Ha!

Angel and Cruz are battling it out in the center of the ring with some beautiful Lucha Libre moves that impresses everyone. Del Toro dodges Angel in the corner of the ring then follows that up with a slingshot off the top rope.

The LWO has been very amazing throughout the match as Wilde takes out both Angel and Humberto at the same time. He even sends Santos crashing on the floor. Ha! Nice.

Things do take a drastic turn as Legado del Fantasma regather their forces a lot more efficiently than before. A move I’ve never seen in the past has planted Joaquin to the mat. They made sure to cut the ring in half to prevent Wilde from reaching his teammates.

Wilde does manage to stay in the game regardless of the pain he’s endured thus far at the hands of all members of Fantasma. Joaquin pushes through with a surprise DDT in the air. He’s doing great. Unfortunately, Angel removes Wilde’s lifesavers by their ankles, causing a momentary delay.

Carlito comes in at full bull rage as he takes down everyone with swiftness. Santos attempts to distract Carlito, so Humberto can deliver a kick to his midsection. With a diving headbutt, Cruz saves the match in favor of the LWO.

At least for now because Santos secretly tags Humberto without Carlito’s knowledge. Carlito performs a great backstabber only to get his efforts thwarted by a sudden roll up courtesy of Escobar.

Winners: Legado del Fantasma


Pretty Deadly vs. Tylor Bate & Pete Dunne- Tag Team match


Last week, Butch and Tylor did incredibly during their match where Butch no longer has an identity crisis. The missing piece was Pete Dunne, the most sadistic version of Butch we already knew years ago. He brought him back.

I personally haven’t seen that part of him, but I’m glad I get to see it now. Pete and Tylor play a double team on Kit Wilson as he plummets to the mat. Dunne kept with his offence as he dismantles Wilson’s arms and fingers.

Bate and Dunne have managed to m0ve the match at their pace by cutting the ring in half. I’ve never seen Wilson in so much pain as I have tonight. Elton tries to help, but he gets knocked down by Bate’s Airplane maneuver.

Pete looked disgusted at some point at Kit’s scurrying. Ha!

Now, Pretty Deadly is able to finally get back on the good side of this fight by isolating Bate from Dunne. Kit places Tylor in a chin lock. Luckily, Tylor avoids further damages from Kit as he tags Pete. He brawls with both men.

Bate’s Bop and Bang to Elton leaves him in need of an exorcism. Ha! Ha! Pete and Tylor double team on Elton before Bate goes crashing on Kit outside the ring. Dunne finishes this match by snapping Prince’s fingers then performs the Bitter End as the final nail in the coffin.

Winners: Tylor Bate & Butch


Next we have the KO Show where Owens “invites”, for lack of a better word, Logan Paul to the stage after that shiner Kevin gave the so-called US Champion. Paul is willing to sue Owens if he walks into the Royal Rumble with his cast on.

Sigh… Why must life be so damn manipulative? This is going to be the most combustible edition of the KO Show ever, but as long as Logan is driven to the ground, I’ll be fine. We’ll all be more than fine.

Logan is the embodiment of “What?” and “Why?” I’m always confused when he feels the need to taint my screen. He says that Owens is the reason he’s in this industry rather than remaining in someone else’s basement like the little spawn that he is.

Apparently, Paul came to his first WrestleMania three years ago… for some reason, and there he was on the receiving end of a Stunner by Owens. Even though I wasn’t present at the time, Kevin did me proud.

So, Logan is bitter? That sums it up then.

Owens gives Paul some credit for actually sticking around and putting in the work, but he’s no Seth Rollins, he’s no Randy Orton, he’s no Sami Zayn, and he’s most definitely no Kevin Owens.

Logan called himself a lot of things, but all I heard was blah, blah, blah, actor, blah, blah, blah. Actor, my ass. Arg, life is sad when he’s around.

I know there must be some sort of conspiracy in the background for Paul to rise to quickly, quicker than LA Knight. Kevin understands and sees that, too. That title on Logan’s shoulder is a joke, so Owens wants to put an end to it.

I don’t know why he’s crying about Kevin wearing a cast when he has metallic plates in his knuckles. Damn, shut the hell up already. Who really has a weapon on them? So just to make Logan feel better, Owens gives him his word he won’t be wearing his cast at the Rumble. He even removed it right now only to get sucker punched once he turned around.

It didn’t keep him down, though, which Logan foolishly thought it would. We get a Rumble preview as Owens pounces on Paul. He kept pursuing Logan, but given that his arm is exposed, Paul took full advantage by slamming it against the post. BIG ouchy.


Kayden Carter & Katana Chance (c) vs. Isla Dawn & Alba Fyre – Women’s Tag Team Championship match


As soon as the bell rings, Alba Fyre quickly goes after Kayden by slamming her face first against the mat. Then Isla delivers a running knee to the jaw of Carter. Unholy Union are coming in strong that it almost ended the current champs twice.

Once Katana is tagged in, she manages to flip the tied in their favor as she knocks Alba out for good measure then focuses on Dawn with a double team.

Unholy Union actually scared more than just the fans during this match, Damage Control, who’s at commentary, as well. They’re good. But clearly, Carter was better when she shows great athleticism by planting Fyre on the temple of her head. The Destroyer.

The final exclamation point was the Keg Stand to retain their Championships. Carter and Chance have put the Kabuki Warriors on notice when they face each other next Friday.

Winners: Kayden Carter & Katana Chance 


We’d like to give thanks to the creator and the first Intercontinental Champion Pat Patterson for bringing the Royal Rumble to its fans. Happy Birthday.

Tensions continue to rise between the Street Profits with Bobby Lashley and the Final Testament. Next week, it comes to a halt as they face each other in the ring to see who the real all mighty is.

Meanwhile, Carmelo Hayes reminds us that what happened last week was something he and Austin Theory were able to escape from not too badly hurt. These things occur in battle, so we’re glad they’re both okay.

However, Theory clearly hasn’t used that unfortunate incident as clarity since he’s being ridiculous for coming in every week in tank-tops. Ha! At least Grayson Waller wears something inventive. But he isn’t very bright these days since he spoke for Theory again by accepting Hayes’ challenge for next Friday in Miami.

Also, Santos Escobar and Carlito have a match.


LA Knight vs. AJ Styles


So much animosity between these two since Styles told us why he’s soo pissed with LA Knight to begin with, aside from wanting the Undisputed Championship, of course.

Styles’ headlock traps the Megastar to the mat, even the back suplex doesn’t soften the tightness of the grip. Later on, Knight is able to buy himself some time by sending AJ face first against the second turnbuckle.

Styles brings more of his aggression as he winds Knight with those quick and precise offensive techniques to force the Megastar to one knee. Plus a back breaker.

LA Knight has the upper hand for little a while until AJ escaped then delivered a sliding knee to the face of his opponent. Knight retaliates by planting Styles’ face against the barricade.

While LA Knight is bouncing Styles’ head off the commentary table, Jimmy Jim strolls to the stage, distracting Knight for what’s to come next. And no, it wasn’t Styles’ kick. It was Solo’s Samoan Spike.

That encourages the referee to stop the match, which swiftly leads to the next one when Sikoa demands Orton to come out. Nick Aldis is here as well with the contract.

Winner: No one


Randy Orton vs. Solo Sikoa


Only 20 seconds of this match has started, and Randy is already squished flat by Sikoa’s butt. We may have to scrap Orton’s body off the floor. Damn. The Viper turns things around by planting Solo on the announcement table. Just like last week.

Randy went there with his vintage DDT to the Enforcer. Orton was preparing for the RKO, but Jimmy came back only to be strike by LA Knight and AJ Styles. Ha! Ha! Ha! A mess.

Orton does manage to put Sikoa away with the RKO. Yay! However, the night isn’t over. LA Knight punches Styles, then Orton delivers an RKO to Knight and AJ. Ha! Not too late after, Roman Superman Punches Randy.

Reigns does one thing right, he signs the contract. Thankfully, he gets a mouthful of RKOs from Randy.

Winner: Randy Orton 

 

TOP PHOTO: Randy Orton standing above Roman Reigns’ body. Courtesy of WWE

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