The one joy I was able to get since Logan Paul’s cursed arrival in WWE, as petty as it may be for some, was that he loses at almost every premium weekend event he’s participated in. That was a blessing to me.

So… you could only imagine, imagine how pissed, aggravated, vexed, absolutely LIVID I must be when he won the US Championship from Rey Mysterio at Crown Jewel.

It took so much out of me to remain calm. To keep myself from breaking things. He Who Will Not Be Named is one of those people you just know you’ll despise no matter what they say otherwise.

I hope he’s proud of the way he obtained that belt because then it’ll make sense. I am a bit confused as to why did Santos Escobar, when he came to help Rey, left the brace knuckles on the mat for that idiot to use? Escobar could have taken them with him, but he didn’t. You see where I’m going with this?

In better news, both Rhea Ripley and Seth Rollins were able to retain their Championships, each in their own grueling matches. It was fun to watch Sami Zayn thwart Damian Priest’s efforts at attempting to cash in his contract. Ha! Ha! The fact that he ran away with it is priceless.

On Monday, however, he was forced to return the briefcase to Adam Pearce. Bummer.

And speaking of returning, I hope John Cena keeps coming back to see the WWE universe despite his loss against Solo Sikoa. I can understand how close to retirement John feels, his talents aren’t how they used to be like everyone before him and after him will get there too, but this roadblock isn’t going to make me stop being a fan of his.

I still see so much in him that isn’t as present in others. Hope. The embodiment of never give up. That’s not something that’s easily extinguished by this loss. His connectivity with the audience goes deeper than that. You know that, don’t you John?

Ooh. I’m in a shock, a happy one that Kevin Owens will be the special guest commentator this evening. I never would have guessed. The funny thing is that Owens came in dressed not as formal as one would be, instead he’s wearing his regular clothes with a blue, red and white tie. He doesn’t own a tie, so Aldis gave him one. Ha!

The reason why Owens is replacing Corey Graves is because he and Carmella welcomed their new baby boy on Wednesday. Congratulations to them. All the best in the world!

Now, on with the show. The moment we hear Rey Mysterio’s theme music playing, Kevin is already in a roaring mood of excitement given he loves Rey. He and the rest of the LWO are making their way to the ring after the events that transpired at Crown Jewel.

Owens finds the strategy of He Who Will Not Be Named to be “nefarious”. It’s absolutely appalling that this is how he wanted to succeed. Disgusting. But anyway, Rey reassures us that he’ll try to get a rematch. However, I wasn’t the only who thought this might have been Escobar’s fault. Carlito has a match against Bobby Lashley after this chat, so he makes his way to the ring early to address exactly what I suspected.

I didn’t think someone was going to bring that up, yet I’m glad they did. I mistakenly reckoned Carlito was going to be pissed at Rey when he grabbed the mic from his hand. Because of these… accusations, which erupts into a frenzy between Carlito and Escobar, Santos decides to leave. Luckily, Rey and Zelina follow after him.

Carlito vs. Bobby Lashley

Well, the show must go on. Lashley is accompanied by The Street Profits dressed as dapper as they come. Owens notes how sharp Montez Ford looks. Quite frankly, he’s always been sharp, it’s Angelo Dawkins who needed help. Ha!

Carlito was backed into a corner, then manages to get out of it followed by a drop kick to Lashley. The All Mighty responds with a clothesline. Backstage, B-Fab is looking on with interest.

Lashley delivers a neck breaker to Carlito while Owens gives his opinion about the brace knuckles used against Rey. Despite not liking the fact that it happened to Mysterio, Kevin says he would have done the same depending on how long the referee’s back was turned… Yikes.

Bobby continues to hammer away at Carlito, trapping him in the corner. He had his opponent pressed against the mat just as the Profits are grinning in Carlito’s face.

Carlito makes a comeback by blocking the Hurt Lock attempt by dropping Lashley with a crossbody. Bobby has Carlito up for a vertical suplex, but he took too much time, so Carlito counters with one of his own. Fantastic.

Bobby blokes himself from colliding with the steel steps, and plants Carlito’s face instead. He then drives Carlito into the barricades followed by the post. Meanwhile, Ashante Thee Adonis wonders what B-Fab is doing watching this match, so she convinces him to not worry. Hmm? After that chat she had with Lashley not too long ago, it leaves me puzzled.

Carlito keeps fighting Lashley by shoving him off the second rope. He continues by sending the All Mighty crashing on the main floor. Ha! Ha! As Bobby is being pushed back inside the square circle by Carlito, Lashley had the official’s attention long enough for Ford to grab Carlito’s ankle.

He manages to escape once Joaquin Wilde got involved, but that upper hand only lasted a few seconds the moment Dawkins bulldozes through Wilde and disposes of Cruz Del Toro. Santos Escobar comes back into the fray… and gets mangled.

The ref wasn’t looking when Montez kicked Carlito in order for Lashley to deliver a winning spear. But this wasn’t the crazy part. After the match, the Profits were crushing Carlito in a beatdown, but Santos simply watched.

……..

Once Rey arrives to assist, the Profits and Lashley leave, that’s when Escobar enters. Santos explains, as much as we can hear, why he didn’t help Carlito due to earlier. That upsets Rey to remind Escobar that they’re the LWO as he goes over to check on his friend.

I thought that maybe he understood and was going to help, instead Santos attacks Rey, shoves Carlito out of the ring then confront Mysterio. I was stunned when Rey decided to slap Santos so many times that it sent him tumbling out of the ring. It appears Rey felt guilty for doing that, questioning what happened in disbelief.

He apologizes, alas, Santos refuses and pushes him against the post. Rey also falls down and his crotch lands on the steel steps. He also delivers a drop kick to crush Rey’s right leg even further. Escobar yells in Rey’s face telling him that he loves him, and that it was supposed to be him and Rey for life. Why do I sense a hint of jealousy?

Zelina starts crying. She informs Santos that he broke the family, not Rey like he’s adamant to believe.

Winner: Bobby Lashley

Backstage, Santos reports that Rey had it coming after being questioned about his actions. Owens is left silent for a few seconds before telling us that he had his fair share of outbursts like this one, but he would never do that to Rey. Kevin thinks it’s Santos who has something coming.

And speaking of getting what’s coming to you, Kairi Sane. When she appeared at Crown Jewel to help Iyo Sky retain, I bet it’s only a matter of time before Bianca Belair has her sights set on Sane. But that’s not all the possibilities on the table. No, no. Last Saturday, I was told that Bayley caused the injury that initiated Kairi’s extensive break. Kairi could be going after Bayley. She looked like she saw a ghost.

Following these events, Bayley is inside the ring, here to address what went down. She says she had a plan for Iyo and Dakota Kai since the creation of Damage Control. Women’s Tag Team Champions, Miss Money in the Bank, WWE Women’s Champion. Iyo has all of these accolades under her belt… because of Bayley’s plan. Ha!

Now, Crown Jewel was meant to be Damage Control’s proudest moment, but given Kairi’s sudden descent, Bayley wants to have a chat with Iyo. However, Kai and Sky weren’t the only ones who showed up. Kairi is here too.

Iyo also had a plan as well. She wants to thank Kairi for assisting her in retaining her title, Sky wonders isn’t that want Bayley wanted. Bayley was concerned about having Kairi around because of what she did to her three years ago. Dakota reassures her that Kairi’s presence is to make Damage Control stronger.

Sane says that she respects Bayley as the leader of Damage Control, and she forgives her. But I don’t think she’ll stay quiet for long. Strategy, my friends, is a double edged sword. Nevertheless, they hug it out, despite Bayley not fully embracing that heartwarming sentiment.

Bianca Belair, as I knew she would show up, felt like a foolish person for believing that Iyo had enough confidence to face her one-on-one for the Championship. Instead, in typical ambushing fashion, other people had to get involved. By the way, Belair came out dressed like a candy cane, and I absolutely love it.

Anyway, she threatens to whoop all three of their asses, but not alone. Charlotte Flair and Asuka are perfect reinforcements. Both the Empress and the Queen weren’t pleased with Kairi joining Damage Control. If this could be a setup for Survivor Series War Games, then I’m all for it.

Dragon Lee vs. Cedric Alexander

We’re running this match a second time because it was so good the first. The fight was already underway as Dragon delivers a drop kick to his opponent. Alexander returns the favor.

Hell, Cedric performs an amazing DDT right off the ropes. Alexander keeps up with his attacks with chops to Lee’s chest. Although, Owens believes there wasn’t enough conviction behind those chops due to fatigue.

Both men slug it out in the middle of the ring. Boom boom everywhere. Lee impresses everyone by sling-shotting Cedric towards the ropes. Lee has been amazing tonight, that powerbomb looked like that would have been enough to put Cedric away, but he kicks out.

Damn. I was surprised by how powerful and far that throw Alexander did to Dragon. It shook commentary too. Oof. That kick to the jaw as well. The clapping sound…

I have no idea how did Cedric flip around like that to use Dragon Lee’s momentum against him, but oh my God, was it spectacular.

Lee delivers an electrifying knee kick to Alexander’s jaw then finishes him off with something I can’t simply call a tornado DDT. It was too great of a move.

Winner: Dragon Lee 

BREAKING NEWS after that heinous attack against Rey, he’s now in a local medical facility being taken care of. Hope he’ll get better soon.

LA Knight vs. Grayson Waller

Prior to this match, LA Knight relives his historic evening at Crown Jewel only being inches away from obtaining the Championship… if it weren’t for Jimmy Uso’s interfering ass. Despite all that, the fans aren’t mad, nor disappointed that he lost because he manhandled Roman Reigns. A blessing to witness. At first, Knight thought he didn’t meet the expectations, but he’s above that.

He was robbed!

Knight isn’t done with The Bloodline until he holds the championship. LA Knight wasn’t even finished talking when his opponent, Grayson Waller, showed up. Owens calls him a “buzzkill”, someone no one wants to see. Ha! Ha! Ha!

Waller comes out here to advise Knight with some honesty, that he’s plainly not the guy to beat Roman. Grayson thinks Knight has no one to blame but himself. The Megastar counters by name-calling Waller as “Kangaroo jackass,”.

Not only that, Waller actually thought he had LA Knight pegged with embarrassment when he asked him if he truly believes he belongs in the same ring as Reigns. Knight replies with a comment I thought of before, the Grayson Waller Effect sounds like a disease. STD according to the Megastar. That made me burst out laughing so much I couldn’t breathe. I also forgot that people were sleeping in my house, so I had to keep it down.

But LA Knight goes even further when he calls Waller a creep for having a five dollar haircut that could mistake him for a child who isn’t allowed within fifty feet of a schoolyard. Ha! Ha! Ha! This man is too much.

Big incel energy. Ha! Since Waller was foolish enough to pick a fight with a very angry version of LA Knight, all that frustration will be taken out on him as the Megastar hits him with the microphone then dumps him outside. Knight grabbed Owens’ water bottle and poured it all over Grayson.

“Waller is all washed up.” Michael Cole said as Owens and Kevin Patrick laugh. What a comical start to a fight. “Do you think Grayson Waller might get booed by his own people in Australia?” asks Patrick. “Grayson Waller gets booed by his own mother.” said Owens. Ha! Ha! Ha!

Once the bell rings, LA Knight throws Waller around like a ragdoll, that clothesline and suplex, man. The onslaught against Grayson was extremely heavy that he can barely get his foot past the door.

LA Knight delivers an effective spinning neck breaker and enters into a cover that leads nowhere after that one count. Waller retaliates with that harsh right hand to the jaw before hammering away.

Knight makes a comeback with a brutal kick to Waller using the ropes, so he could tumble in front of the commentary desk again. As LA bounces Grayson’s head on the table, Owens kept saying “Yes. Yes. Yes. Affirmative.” in sync with the attack. My stomach has been in knots because of all this laughing since the show started due to KO’s snarky retorts.

Knight went back inside the ring to break the count, but he was driven into the commentary desk, the steel steps and hit with a massive clothesline. I cackled again when Waller encouraged Owens to say something else only for KO to insist that Grayson is wearing too many sparkles.

At some point, Waller was gaining the upper hand as he stretched LA Knight out like a torture device. What was funny is that it seemed like there was no count into his sad version of a cover. The ref didn’t even touch the mat. Ha! Ha!

Grayson utilizes a half Boston Crab submission that was painful, but not enough to put Knight away. The Megastar had Waller scouted and plants him with a back suplex.

LA Knight gains back momentum with a victorious BFT.

Later on, KO made both Waller and Theory look like idiots for doubting that he could punch them at the same time two weeks ago. Their faces every time Owens paused the screen. Ha! Ha! This is the most I’ve laughed tonight.

Winner: LA Knight

Back in June 27, 2002, John Cena stepped up to Kurt Angle’s open challenge and dismantled the man with his “ruthless aggression”. He shook hands with The Undertaker when he was a Heavyweight Champion congratulating him on his confidence.

The Cena of today feels disappointed with himself for not making his match against Sikoa a must win. The WWE universe are still processing the loss. The Enforcer is returning next week after securing a win. Better yet, KO helps the fans and Cena move forward with another showing of Theory and Waller getting punched. Ha!

Of course, Theory has finally had enough and makes his way to the commentary desk followed closely by Waller. They poured water on top of Owens’ head then flung the empty bottle towards either Patrick or Cole. The water on his head, he can take, but KO decides to let himself get suspended by pursuing the two idiots because of the disrespect they showed Michael and Kevin Patrick.

“Go on, KO!” encourages Patrick. I had the best time with Owens on commentary. He should come back and do it again.

Jimmy Uso heard what LA Knight had to say about him, so he decides to issue a challenge for next week. “Yeet.” he says until the call he got from Roman telling him to stop saying that, so he ends up saying “No yeet.” Ha! You’re letting yourself be controlled again, Jimmy Jim.

Bianca Belair, Asuka & Charlotte Flair vs. Damage Control – 6-Women Tag Team match

Bianca Belair and Bayley start this match off as Belair drop kicks her opponent at the very beginning followed by a power slam then a Moonsault entering into an early cover. Things get momentarily out of hand once Bianca crashes on top of Iyo and Bayley then Flair delivers a big boot to Kairi.

Charlotte catches Sky in midair then sends her into a fall away slam across the ring. I’ve been wanting to see Sane wrestle as she gets tagged in to face a very angry Bianca. She savagely shoved Kairi down to the mat.

There was a double team with Kairi and Iyo against Bianca while the official was distracted by Bayley and Dakota. Damage Control were making sure that Belair remained trapped in their corner to prevent her from tagging.

Belair fought through with a strong right hand to Bayley then crawls her way towards Charlotte, who’s unfortunately taken out by Kairi. And as if things couldn’t get any worst, a seemingly inching to get into this match Asuka leaves Belair to dry by misting her in the face plus a kick.

While Damage Control are hugging it out with Asuka, Flair has seen enough, so she pounces after them. Alas, the numbers game was too great as they had Flair pinned. Shotzi tries to help, but she gets demolished as well.

Kairi delivers the Insane Elbow to Bianca as they stand above three dismantled bodies.

Winners: No one

 

TOP PHOTO: Damage Control and Asuka. Courtesy of WWE