Wrestling fans weren’t expecting much as they headed into the 2005 edition of No Mercy, but what they received was even less than what they bargained for. Batista’s horrible title defense capped off a night of disappointments. Rather than producing a solid PPV like Raw’s Unforgiven, SmackDown! left it’s followers begging for mercy.
After a little hype, the time has come for the Batista/Eddie Guerrero World Heavyweight Championship match. Batista’s reign as champion has been nothing short of horrible, showcasing a series of awful matches. It seems that no matter who WWE has put up against him, his matches haven’t passed the bar. Nevertheless, the Houston crowd was pumped and ready for Batista/Guerrero.
The match started off as Guerrero tried to ground “The Animal”, going right for his legs, but Batista shrugged him off. Guerrero went to take down Batista again, but was again shrugged off as though he was nothing. After taking a quick breather, Guerrero came back into the ring only to be caught with a powerful headlock that applied a serious amount of force on the head and neck of “Latino Heat”.
Guerrero attempted to fight his way out of the grip, but once, free, he was slammed a series of times and sent to the floor by the champion. Guerrero, frustrated, picked up a chair, but thought better of using it. Upset at what Guerrero attempted to do, Batista grabbed the former WWE Champion and questioned him as to whether or not he was going to really hit him with the chair.
While Batista had Guerrero’s head, Guerrero reached and pulled him down neck first over the middle rope. With Batista on his back in the middle of the ring, Guerrero ascended the ropes and landed a Frog Splash on the back of Batista for a two count. With Batista’s back in a whirlwind of pain, Guerrero locked his leg’s around Batista’s body, driving the air out of him.
Batista was able to get to a vertical base and break the hold, but Guerrero immediately came out and dropkicked Batista in the back, locking the champs leg in a Boston Crab. When Batista got to the ropes, Guerrero grabbed a tag rope and was thinking about using it, but again advised against it. Again, Batista was able to reverse the Rear Naked Choke into a Bear Hug.
Guerrero took down the champ again and went to put on the Texas Clover Leaf, but it was turned into a small package for a two count. As Batista sent Guerrero into the ropes and charged in at him, Guerrero jumped over Batista, fell backwards and took out the referee. From there, Guerrero laid out the champion and picked up a steel chair. Guerrero went to hit Batista with the chair, but again just threw it away.
Batista, angered by Guerrero’s attempted chair use took the heavy offense to Guerrero. Guerrero mounted another comeback, hitting the three amigos, but after missing the Frog Splash, Batista put an end to Guerrero with a Spinebuster to retain the World Heavyweight Championship. After the match both men shook hands. The horrible reign of Batista continues on as SmackDown! continues to struggle.
Match One – Six Person Tag Team Match – MNM and Melina vs Legion of Doom and Christy Hemme
Christy Hemme has converted herself into a modern day Sunny as WWE tries to revive the Legion of Doom once again. The match jump-started as MNM was talking strategy, Heidenreich went over and grabbed Nitro, setting him up for some double teaming. Once Mercury got in the ring, things went downhill for the tag champs as Animal got hit with The Snapshot, but with a series of distractions it was only counted for a two. MNM continued the double team, working over the injured shoulder of Road Warrior Animal. After some brawling, Animal set Melina up for the Doomsday Device with Christy Hemme delivering the punishing blow. Winners Via Pinfall – Legion of Doom and Christy Hemme
Match Rating – 5/10
Backstage, Batista bumped into Eddie Guerrero. The two wished each other luck and left.
We then shot over to the WWE.com Instant Access Zone where The Legion of Doom and Christy Hemme joined the crew to answer questions for fans.
Next out was Simon Dean who is followed by a chef with a plate full of double cheeseburgers. Dean insulted the crowd and finished up by saying that if he lost to Bobby Lashley, he would eat all 20 double cheeseburgers.
Match Two – Simon Dean vs Bobby Lashley
This was just an annihilation. Dean tried to fire off some offense by distracting the referee with a few hamburgers and hitting Lashley in the head with the tray, but to no avail. Lashley went off on Dean, planting him with a Dominator (Inverted Face Slam) for the win.
Winner Via Pinfall – Bobby Lashley
Match Rating – 3/10
Steve Romero caught up with John “Bradshaw” Layfield and Jillian Hall. JBL was approached with the fact the Raw superstars might be invading No Mercy. JBL didn’t seem phased and continued to talk about how the underdog would not win. Rey Mysterio Jr. stepped in and got yelled at for speaking Spanish. He said that he brought a gift for JBL, a Rey Mysterio mask. Mysterio said he would need it after the underdog won. JBL declined so Mysterio gave it to Hall.
At the WWE.com Instant Access Center, Lashley joined the crew and met up with Theodore Long to shake hands and exchange pleasantries.
Match Three – Fatal Four-Way match for the United States Championship Match – “The Rabid Wolverine” Chris Benoit (C) vs Booker T w/ Sharmell vs Christian vs Orlando Jordan
Sharmell has the pleasure of introducing the hometown hero, Booker T. The match started with all four men brawling, until Orlando Jordan got stuck in the ring with Booker T. After a few offensive moves from the Booker Man, Benoit went for the win, locking Jordan into the Crippler Crossface. As Jordan went to tap, Christian broke things up. Once Booker and Benoit found themselves alone in the ring, they went right at each other, that was until Christian and Jordan reentered, putting an end to that battle. Booker T was able to score a couple of near falls and a Spin-a-Rooni. All four men entered the ring again and it was complete mayhem. Benoit was able to lock a Crippler Crossface on Christian, but Jordan returned the favor from earlier on, breaking the hold. After Jordan was disposed of again, Benoit placed a picture-perfect sharpshooter on Christian for the submission win.
Winner Via Submission and still WWE United States Champion – “The Rabid Wolverine” Chris Benoit
Match Rating – 5/10
After the match, Sharmell complained to Booker, saying that Benoit caused him to lose the match. Well, it makes sense…
In the lockeroom, Dean is shown being forced to eat the 20 Double Cheeseburgers by Lashley.
Benoit then met up with Long and the crew at WWE.com Instant Access.
Match Four – Mr. Kennedy vs Hardcore Holly
Prior to the match, Kennedy introduced himself, which was quite possibly the funniest thing on the entire PPV. Holly wasted no time going right to work on the brash newcomer. Kennedy was able to mount a comeback, sending Holly to the floor and then driving his arm into the steel ring post. Kennedy brought the fight back into the ring and went right back to the arm of Holly. Holly was able to get Kennedy grounded once again, but when he went to the top rope, Kennedy caught him and hit the Inverted Samoan Drop for the one-two-three. He announced himself the winner and left. The trainer and more referees came out to check on Holly who refused their help. As Holly was leaving, Slyvan came out and attacked him.
Winner Via Pinfall – Mr. Kennedy
Match Rating – 5/10
Back in Dean’s lockeroom, he is eating the burgers when he finds a huge string of hair in one of them.
In a hallway, Booker T and Sharmell are arguing, with Sharmell saying that Benoit is doing an interview with WWE Instant Access because he won. She is upset with Booker’s losing streak. Kennedy walked by and called himself a winner, he walked off, but came back to call Booker a loser. Sharmell stopped Booker from chasing Kennedy and said that Booker’s only problem is himself.
The next WWE PPV will take place in San Diego, CA on Tuesday, November 1, 2005, as WWE presents Taboo Tuesday.
Match Five – John “Bradshaw” Layfield w/Jillian Hall vs Rey Mysterio
Rey Mysterio used his obvious speed advantage to get ahead on JBL. Running around the ring, Mysterio got JBL winded and proceeded to dive through the ropes, kicking JBL in the side of his head. While Mysterio had his back turned, JBL got back into the ring and rammed Mysterio in the kidney with a knee. Mysterio used a pair of boots to the shin of JBL to get the big man grounded once again, but a thumb to the eye of Mysterio cured him of his problems. Mysterio went for a 619, but JBL got out of the way, only to be met with a bulldog to the floor. As Mysterio was about to get back into the ring, JBL swept his legs out from under him smacking Mysterio’s face into the steel steps. From there JBL remained in firm control until Mysterio hit him with a Tornado DDT off the second rope. Mysterio followed up with a huricanrana and a Bronco Buster. JBL got up and went to hit Mysterio, but instead almost took out Hall. Mysterio was able to connect with a 619, but Layfield dodged the West Coast Pop, meeting Mysterio with a Clothesline From Hell.
Winner Via Pinfall – John “Bradshaw” Layfield
Match Rating – 5/10
Match Six – Handicap Casket Match – “Cowboy” Bob Orton and “The Legend Killer” Randy Orton vs The Undertaker
The druids brought out a casket and were followed to the ring by The Undertaker. WWE seems to be bringing back all of the classic Undertaker segments (ie. The mannequins in the caskets, the lightning bolts, etc.). The Ortons attempted to go after The Undertaker from two sides, but wound up catching a series of fists to their faces for their efforts. Bob Orton was the first man to be tossed into the casket, but Randy avoided it, giving his father a chance to get out. Undertaker was thrown in the casket next, but as the Ortons did, he was able to avoid the lid being shut on him. ‘Taker took down Randy via Old School. ‘Taker went to do the same to Bob Orton, but was sent packing by Randy. The Ortons superplexed The Undertaker off the top rope, Bob Orton went for the pin, but was informed that they did not count. They then went to double superplex The Undertaker into the casket, but were reversed. Bob Orton grabbed a fire extinguisher, The Undertaker sent Randy into the casket via a Chair Shot, and as Bob was about to hit ‘Taker with the fire extinguisher, he moved out of the way and caught Bob with a Triangle Choke. With both Ortons in the Casket, The Undertaker went to close the lid, but Randy popped up. All three men wound up battling it out in the casket. As Randy and Undertaker fought out, Undertaker closed the lid on Bob. Randy hit a wicked scoop powerslam on ‘Taker and when he opened the casket, he realized that his father was still inside. As he was figuring out what to do, ‘Taker regathered himself and low blowed Randy. Both men battled back and forth, but when Randy got cocky, he was hit with The Last Ride. ‘Taker went to open the casket, but Bob Orton was waiting inside with a full fire extinguisher. Orton blasted it twice at ‘Taker, leading to an RKO. A fire extinguisher to the head of ‘Taker sent him flying into the casket. As Randy went to close the lid he was dragged in, Bob closed the lid, but the match could not be one with a member from both sides inside. When the casket opened, Randy cracked Undertaker in the head with the steel chair and closed the lid, locking it shut with The Undertaker inside.
Winners Via Casket – “Cowboy” Bob Orton and “The Legend Killer” Randy Orton
Match Rating – 5/10
After the match, The Ortons brought the casket up the stage, as Randy began hitting it repeatedly with an axe, claiming that he would send Undertaker back where he came from. Bob brought out some gasoline that Randy poured all over the casket, before setting it a blaze. Another classic Undertaker moment…repeated.
Wrestlemania 22 will be taking place from Chicago on April 2, 2006. Hopefully WWE can do something to improve their PPV quality by then.
Match Seven – WWE Cruiserweight Championship Match – Nunzio w/ Big Vito (C) vs “The Juice” Juventud w/Psicosis and Super Crazy
The un-identified title is on the line on PPV. You would think that with all the cruiserweights WWE has been bringing in, they would do something to promote this title a little better. This is a good start, but will it last? Juvi hit Vito with a headscisscors, then followed up by hitting Nunzio with a Juvi Driver to capture the WWE Cruiserweight Championship. Carlos Cabrera from the Spanish Announce Table interviewed The Mexicools after the match, with the basic feeling that they are all happy.
Winner Via Pinfall and NEW WWE Cruiserweight Champion – “The Juice” Juventud
Match Rating – 4/10
Back in Simon Dean’s lockeroom, he finished what he thought was his 20th double cheeseburger, but Bobby Lashley informed him that it was only his 19th and that he had one more to finish. Dean went to take a bite, but instead headed for the bathroom to throw up.
In the WWE Instant Access Zone, The Mexicools were shown partying with the WWE Cruiserweight Championship.
Match Eight – World Heavyweight Championship Match – “The Animal” Batista (C) vs Eddie Guerrero
Winner Via Pinfall and STILL World Heavyweight Champion – “The Animal” Batista
Match Rating – 5/10
Overall Event Rating – 5/10
An absolutely terrible PPV from WWE. They have alot of talented wrestlers on SmackDown! who could be entertaining if given the chance, but instead they all had to suffer. WWE’s SmackDown! brand has been suffering for quite some time now, and if things don’t turn around, the ratings will continue to go down. This PPV did nothing but prove SmackDown! cannot put out a decent PPV.
