Stevie Ray said it best when he exclaimed…”I can’t believe what I am seeing!” WCW’s Halloween Havoc 2000 was one of the worst in pro wrestling history. It is not enough to chalk it up to the confusion and turmoil in the company since it was announced that Time Warner is looking to remove the promotion from its books before its merger with America Online at the end of this year. That excuse is not good enough. Not good enough to the loyal fans paying to watch the spectacle. Not good enough to the WCW employees who’ve worked so hard to turn things around.

When the most exciting thing on the show is a crazed fan jumping Mike Awesome in the stands, you know you are in a world of hurt. Last night WCW did not look like a company trying to put on the best face to a potential buyer — which despite overzealous reports in the online press will prove not to be the WWF at all. Barring a few exceptions, what we saw was a promotion throwing in the towel. How else can anyone explain the severe drop in quality from the last pay-per-view?

Halloween Havoc was an outright embarrassment that flies in the face of the federation’s rich and illustrious history. WCW couldn’t even get the play-by-play right. The announcing team of Stevie Ray, Mark Madden and Tony Schiavonie should be ashamed of the atrocious performance they put in. Talking over each other time and time again, it was hard to even make out what the heck they were gabbing on about. Too busy topping themselves they distracted attention from the matches rather than supporting them. Madden’s stupid comment about Vampiro and Awesome not being able to get it together in their match is proof of why he doesn’t belong behind the microphone…now or ever. Where’s Mike Tenay when you need him? Same place as the silver-tongued Bobby Heenan one would hazard to guess — WCW limbo where continuity and fresh ideas are sent to die.

Right on down the line, the matches were deplorably booked and wrestled as if the show was slapped together minutes before the broadcast. Excluding the opening tag team title bout, everything went by in a chaotic, mind-numbing blur of mediocrity. Stacking the card with underdeveloped talent the fans aren’t made to care about (The Natural Born Thrillers, MIA) didn’t help matters either. Even the efforts of first class talent like Vampiro, Jeff Jarrett, Mike Awesome, Lance Storm and Sting, who can usually save a show, got waylaid by awful booking and disordered pacing. Not even these superior superstars could get things back on track.

The final nails in Halloween Havoc’s coffin were two throw-away main events in Goldberg battling both members of Kronik and Booker T’s title defence against Scott Steiner. The handicap bout saw the booking return to the predictable Goldberg matches we’ve endured before. You know the ones. Goldberg takes a few hits. He bounces back and Jack Hammers his foe(s) to the mat in like three minutes flat. Which is what he did to Kronik. No surprise there. Booker T against Steiner had some potential until for some inane reason Steiner was scripted to wail on everyone with a lead pipe and get himself disqualified thereby flushing his WCW World Title shot down the drain. A confusing and contemptuous finish to what could have been the standout bout.

Halloween Havoc should be the last straw. WCW has the talent. They have the resources at their disposal. The time for excuses is over. Either work towards getting back to a competitive level or pull the plug already. Watching something that used to be truly great die a slow, painful death is pure agony.

Editor’s Note: The shoddy workmanship also extended to WCW’s Web site too. At approximately 11:30 p.m. last night, the spotlight on their home page promoted the WCW Mayhem CD hyping a November 1999 release date. What’s up with that? (7:30 am ET addendum: WCW.com has re-launched with a new look, which may have explained it.)

  • The next WCW pay-per-view is Mayhem on November 26th

    WCW Halloween Havoc 2000 Results

    Boogie Knights (challengers) Vs Kidman, Mysterio (challengers) Vs Jindrak, O’Haire (champions) (WCW World Tag Team Title Match)

  • Hats off to these three teams for charging out of the gate. Too bad it was all for nothing. Jindrak with the Swanton Dive keeps the belts around the champs’ waists. Everyone attacks Kidman and Mysterio. A-WALL clears the ring as trash cans are hung around the ring in preparation for the Hardcore Title bout.
  • Winners: …and still WCW World Tag Team Champions…Jindrak and O’Haire at 10:42.
  • Match Rating: 6 / 10.

    Reno (champion) Vs A-WALL (challenger) (WCW Hardcore Title Match)

  • A waste of air time showcasing two people fans have heard nothing from and could care less about. Laughs are numerous as A-WALL uses a brightly lit computer monitor on Reno’s head…even after it is unplugged. Can you say prop? A-WALL clocks Fit Finley for the heck of it. Reno (the evil Highlander villain) puts A-WALL through a table to hang on to the gold. The Natural Born Thrillers punk A-WALL. MIA comes to his rescue.
  • Winner: …and still WCW Hardcore Champion…Reno at 10:43.
  • Match Rating: 1 / 10.
  • Douglas is shown taking over Kevin Nash’s duties with The Thrillers. Kronik tries to convince members of the local “Athletics Commission” that Goldberg is too injured to fight them.

    The Perfect Event Vs MIA

  • Match was set-up due to the previous run-in by The Thrillers and MIA’s response to it. On the spot booking, you gotta love it. Guerrero does a Tornado DDT for the pinfall.
  • Winners: MIA at 9 minutes and 25 seconds.
  • Match Rating: 3 / 10.

    Torrie Wilson, Shane Douglas Vs Konnan, Tygress

  • Wilson is dressed like Wonder Woman. Konnan is injured so Tygress will go it alone. At a minute in, Konnan arrives to fight. Wilson plants Konnan with a Stunner and he sells it? Douglas almost gets pinned by Tygress following a DDT? Huh? What gives. Konnan and Tygress come out on top.
  • Winners: Konnan, Tygress at 8 minutes and 32 seconds.
  • Match Rating: 1 / 10.

    Buff Bagwell Vs David Flair (First Blood – DNA Match)

  • Flair brings a DNA kit with him to the ring. Yeah, okay. Flair bleeds and the ref declares Bagwell the winner. Lex Luger congratulates Bagwell holding his hand up in victory then clotheslines him and hurls him into a steel post. Buff is bleeding from his mouth. Flair, who has hidden medical talents we don’t know about, takes blood from Bagwell and delivers it to a pair of eggheads in the back. They promise results of a paternity test tonight on Nitro. I know I am on the edge of my seat. Yawn.
  • Winner: Buff Bagwell at 5 minutes and 38 seconds.
  • Match Rating: 0 / 10.

    Mike Sanders Vs The Cat (Kick Boxing Match)

  • Your typical inferior wrestling-boxing match with much stalling and dubious knock downs. Douglas interferes and punches The Cat with a steel chain wrapped around his fist. The Cat is down but gets back up. The Cat brawls with Douglas outside the ring and is counted out. Who was the booker behind this roof-raiser? Mr. T?
  • Winner: Mike Sanders via countout at 7 minutes and 38 seconds.
  • Match Rating: 0 / 10.

    Mike Awesome Vs Vampiro

  • Mike Awesome puts up his WCW World Title shot on Nitro. Vampiro has raided Saturn’s locker and is decked out like Marilyn Manson. Awesome and Vampiro fight in the crowd. Vampiro clobbers Awesome with a microphone and then beats That 70’s Guy with a crutch he has taken from a fan. One fan jumps on Awesome trying to get him in a headlock or DDT him. Vampiro throws the fan to the ground and Awesome punches the guy four or five times in the face. The attack ruins both wrestlers’ concentration. They miss moves and their timing is all off. Vampiro goes from one side to the other searching for something under the ring and can’t find whatever it was supposed to be. He is visibly upset to whoever goofed placing the object. Mike Awesome Bombs Vamp from the top rope to notch the win. Vampiro’s head bounced off the canvas hard and needs some medical assistance to make it to the back.
  • Winner: Mike Awesome at 9 minutes and 49 seconds.
  • Match Rating: 3 / 10.

    Lance Storm (champion) and Hacksaw Jim Duggan (challenger) Vs General Rection (challenger) (U.S. – Canadian Title Match)

  • The ref takes away Duggan’s 2×4 and what’s left of his gimmick. Elix attempts a run-in. Major Gunns gingerly bats him off the ring apron with the Canadian flag. As Storm debates the finer points of flag swinging with Gunns, Rection gets the 1-2-3 over Duggan. Major Gunns and the MIA whoop it up with Rection.
  • Winner: …and new WCW Canadian – U.S. Heavyweight Champion…General Rection at 10 minutes and 1 second.
  • Match Rating: 4 / 10.

    Sting Vs Jeff Jarrett

  • Every so often during the match, an impostor Stings get involved. There’s about seven of them all portraying Sting at different points of his career. One even pops up from under the ring. There’s the day-glo Sting. The Crow Sting. The Wolf Pack Sting. You get the picture. The Sting clones are no match for The Dark Warrior. He takes them out one by one without breaking a sweat. Sting no-sells a guitar shot from a fake Sting and Death Drops him. Jarrett cracks him with another for the win. Sting bleeds from a cut in his forehead.
  • Winner: At 14 minutes and 40 seconds, Jeff Jarrett.
  • Match Rating: 3 / 10.

    Booker T (champion) Vs Scott Steiner (challenger) (WCW World Heavyweight Title Match)

  • Winner: …and still WCW World Heavyweight Champion…Booker T at 13 minutes and 32 seconds.
  • Match Rating: 2 / 10.

    Goldberg Vs Kronik

  • Kronik believes Goldberg won’t show. Da Man gets medical clearance and dashes their hopes of an easy win. Goldberg pins Brian Adams at 2:25 by spearing him through a table and Clark at 3:42 with the Jack Hammer.
  • Winner: Goldberg at 5 minutes and 7 seconds.
  • Match Rating: 0 / 10.
  • Total Event Time: 2 hours and 50 minutes
  • Overall Event Rating: 2 / 10.